Children are the greatest tests of one’s mastery of the arts of charm and kindness - Deepstash
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Children are the greatest tests of one’s mastery of the arts of charm and kindness

The reason why we may feel tongue-tied and inept around shy five-year-olds or a moody 10-year-old is that children are unable to do any of the usual things that ease social encounters between adult strangers.

They don't ask polite questions about what we've been up to. They don't consider what might be important to us. They don't do the news or the weather and can't tell us much about themselves and their interests.

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Limited social skills

Limited social skills

It's easy to think we possess reasonable social skills because we know how to have a conversation with strangers and can occasionally make a whole group laugh. 

A greater test than this, and surprising in its ability to trip us up, is to have a pleasant time with a...

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Famous examples of people who know how to become vulnerable

Famous examples of people who know how to become vulnerable

Montaigne said he found nothing more notable in the life of Socrates than that he was very gifted at playing with children. In his later years, Socrates spent many hours playing games and giving children piggybacks for 'all actions, says philosophy, equally become and equally hon...

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How to engage with strangers

Both King Henri VI and Socrates knew how to engage with children.

  • They put aside their well-known virtues and prestige to make themselves vulnerable - the same way one should be when a friendship is at stake.
  • They knew how to find common ground.

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