Dig a Little Deeper

Many couples have reached a cozy state of companionship. The humdrumness of life affects the long-term relationship.

It is not uncommon to lose the 'fire' and is unrealistic to expect consistency.

Though love, sex, and intimacy do fluctuate over our lifetimes, there are several possible ways to reconnect with your partner and rekindle the relationship.

As the initial stage of love fades away, a deeper, richer sense of each other should take its place, and couples can find more ways to make things interesting and fun.

Staying curious about each other and finding things, memories, places, and activities that are yet to be shared or experienced together is a great way to rekindle the relationship.
Revisiting your past and finding ways to connect better by looking at the other with 'new' eyes makes us see many things that were overlooked earlier.

Our relationships have been sidelined, with excitement and novelty taking a backseat, due to our lives daily struggle.
The forgotten skill of nurturing and prioritizing your relationship is imperative. Example: Daily time together, communicating with each other lovingly and honestly.

Conscious uncoupling, where slight rejections and small disagreements drift couples apart is a reality. 

The key to avoiding this is to dig deeper and find out the small details and core issues that turn into a big problem later. Talking about and clearing these issues is crucial for a long and healthy relationship.

Daily responsibilities and other things that need our attention (like child care, or aging parents) can take their toll on relationships.\

Clear communication and daily check-ins are what's required in this case, as is being clear about your own needs.

Before saying something that may hurt your partner, like a 'hard talk' session, it is a good idea to start in a kinder note, putting your intended talk in the right context, focusing on the positive outcome, and not on the problem itself.

Starting these conversations at the earliest is the best way to go, as the inertia can build up to include further resentments and negative feelings. If couples are not communicating when the problems arise, these issues can manifest in other ways, like disinterest or an affair.

Remembering all the good things about your partner with a 'gratitude list' is a great way to keep things in perspective, as there are moments in a long-term relationship when you will perceive your partner as unhealed, needy or unattractive.

If you are not taking care, are neglecting or rejecting yourself, this can make their partner also reject you eventually. Speaking to your partner with respect and love puts them up back on the correction course.