The 100-zero rule
Either give somebody 100% of your attention or zero.
If you’re half paying attention to your kid or your partner while doing something else, you are failing at paying attention to them and at whatever else you were trying to do.
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Aim for zero
In any given situation you’re either a ‘plus-one’, a ‘zero’ or a ‘minus-one’.
- If you're minus-one, you’re a liability and actively cause problems.
- If you’re a zero, you’re generally competent and don’t get in the way.
- If you’re a plus-one, you’re ac...
Honor the priority of the moment
Designate specific hours for work, family, and self-care, and don’t let them bleed into each other.
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Listen
Once you voice what’s bothering you, be sure to hear how your partner responds. Give him or her a chance to speak and listen to what he or she says.
It may be that you’re misinterpreting the behavior, he or she wasn’t conscious of how you feel, or you’re doing or saying something to i...
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