Things To Consider

Using breaks when speaking helps with emphasizing your points. However, don’t just pause because you know how important breaks are as they might be more confusing than helpful. Instead, use them strategically after you said something important

When it comes to interpreting body language, I recommend trusting your intuition as you will unconsciously pick up subtle changes and micro expressions which you might not be able to explain rationally.

In t...

Emphasize the ending of your sentences. Lower your voice after you finished it or raise it, if it is a question. Lowering your voice at the end of the question can also have a very powerful impact.

You don’t have to do this ...

Ranks are different from status. Remember that someone can have a high or low status, depending on what they do in a certain situation.

Just because someone has a higher rank, doesn’t mean their status is higher in t...

When analysing behaviour, pay attention to these five things:

• Frequency: How often the behaviour occurs.
• Order: In which order the behaviour occurs.

There are three types of emotions:

• Primary emotions that show what is important to us in the moment.
• Secondary emotions which are the emotional reaction to our primary e...

“Whether someone is treated as something special does not depend on the person themselves, but on the behaviour and actions of the people present.”

Just like a famous person wouldn’t be recognised if no one payed attention t...

When it comes to body language, practice is essential. Only by observing closely and taking time to reflect you can truly understand human behaviour. This applies to both understanding behaviour of others and your own – a...

Just like you have your own island, so does everyone else. The closer their island is to yours, to more likely you are to understand them. Maybe your islands overlap, which means that you share the same values etc.

Your goal...

• Imagine a 90° angle in front of you. Make sure that the people you want to influence are in that 90° field.
• To reach everyone in the audience, even the people in the back, you don’t necessarily have to speak louder. I...

The outside is the way you look, behave and act, while the inside is how you feel and what you think. People only see what’s outside.

When changing the outside without changing the inside, y...

1. Ego: The persons that behaves (= you).
2. Room: The place of the interaction.
3. People: The people influenced by you.

...

As we have already seen, knowing how you view yourself and how others perceive you is important. After figuring these out, you can think about how you actually want to be perceived by others and the necessary steps you need to take in order to achieve tha...

Self-awareness is the key to knowing what impression you leave on other people and how to improve your interactions with them. You can achieve self-awareness through reflection. Meditate on your internal state on a daily basis and feel yo...

In an organization or in society in general, there are different ranks, for instance a politician is ranked higher than a prisoner.

People with the same rank associate more as they feel more comfortable arou...

We often attribute characteristics to someone based on one single characteristic. Let’s say someone is attractive: You tend to think they are also smart, rich and live a good life even though you don’t know.

Be aware of that...

• Illustrators: Gestures to illustrate something, e.g. creating a little space between your hands to illustrate closeness.
• Emblems: Gestures with a certain meaning in a culture e.g. shaking your head, p...

Your status can either be high (dominant) or low (submissive) and is defined by all the things you do and don’t do such as how often you blink, your loudness, your movements and speed etc.

The two types aren...

... is the person you want to impress with your behaviour. This could be a guy at a party, your boss or someone else.

Around the hot person, you tend to act “weird” and somewhat inauthentic to impress them, ...

Words such as “uh” or “uhm” should be reduced as much as possible.

If you catch yourself during any other behaviour instead, try to say “uhm” a little longer as you normally would. This will give you and others time to think and can put emph...

Your status is dependent on the situation and the people you are interacting with. One person automatically has a higher status. You can visualise this with a seesaw that is up on one side and low on the other but that can change any time.

Give the door as little attention as possible and instead focus on the people in the room. This includes not looking at the door but facing the room. Again, imagine you did this every day. You can open the door with one hand and close it with the other wi...

This is also essential when wanting to manage your own impression: Recognizing what the other person is doing and maybe thinking and feeling.

You can improve your awareness of others by doing some simple exercises:

According to the island model, everyone lives on their own island.

• Your island = the past: Your experiences, morals/values, knowledge/education, talents/skills, personality.
• Your...

When interacting with strangers, we only know what we can see. Our interpretations of their actions are often wrong as we don’t know the entire context.

• Assume people have good intentions and they will ...

In moments you have embarrassed yourself, you have three options:

• Ignore it and hope the people around you forget about it (which is usually not the case).
• Explain yourself and g...

There are two types of objectives people aim for:

• Overriding objectives are things you are mostly unaware of, desires stored in your unconscious mind. They mostly drive your behaviour without you even r...

Power refers to skills, talents and competence. There are three dimensions of power:

• Individual vs. structural: Talents that are learned and trained (e.g. knowledge, charisma) vs. things you are born wi...

Have you noticed that you act differently around certain people? It might be because you want to give off a certain impression around them or fulfil their expectations (or at least those you think they have).

You are not playing only...

Self-worth is directly linked to your status. When feeling confident in yourself and having a high sense of self-efficacy, your status will automatically increase.

Raising other people’s confidence is not on...

Often, what you say is not as important as how you say it. Our voices communicate feelings, even though we might not want it.

The reason why your voice sounds differently on audio is because when speaking, y...

1. Get to know the impact fields of ego - space - people.
2. Sharpen your perception of yourself and others.
3. Define your desired personal impact