If you are not living your life for yourself then who is going to live it for you ? You are living only your own life. When it comes to who you are living it for, ofcourse its you.

"The issue is not about how the world is, but about how you are"...With this touchy line introduction helps us to understand that this book is all about Adlerian Psychology. We all know that All problems are interpersonal problems. There is always a cause before an effect, so there is always a psychological issue behind each and every action of ours. That means Who we are now (the effect) is determined by occurances in the past (the causes). So let's deep dive.

Why Should You Read This Book ?

Pursuit of superriority - There's a tendency to think of it as the desire to try to be superior to other people; as the desire to climb higher It is the mindset of taking a single step forward on one's own feet, not the mindset of competition of the sort that necessitates aiming to be greater than other people It's enough to just keep moving in a forward direction, without competing with anyone. There is no need to compare oneself with others

Life is not a competition.

When one is conscious of competition and victory and defeat, it is inevitable that feelings of inferiority will arise. Because one is constantly comparing oneself to others and thinking, I beat that person or I lost to that person. The inferiority complex and the superiority complex are extension of that.This is what is so terrifying about competition. Even if you're not a loser, even if you're someone who keeps on winning, if you are someone who has places himself in competition, you still never has a moment's peace. You do not want to be loser. So you can't trust other people.

You're the only one worrying about your apperance

The feeling of inferiority is an issue of value judgement Why is it that people seek recognition from others ? In many cases, it is due to influence of rewards and punishment education. We are not living to satisfy other people's expectations

Do not live to satisfy the expectations of others

We are not determined by our experiences, but the meaning we give them is self-determiningWe determine our own lives according to the meaning we give to those past experiences. Your life is not something that someone gives you, but something you choose yourself, and you are the one who decides how you live

Trauma does not exist.

Its fine to be 'Just as you are'The important thing is not what one is born with, but what use one makes of that equipment.

Be ok just as you are.

The issue is really what sort of meaning I attribute to the problem(height) ; what sort of value I give it. The feeling of inferiority we're suffering from are subjective interpretations rather than objective facts Value is something that's based on a social context. An inferiority complex is an excuse. The condition of having a feeling of inferiority is a condition of feeling some sort of lack in oneself in the present situation

Feeling of inferiority are subjective assumptions.

Everyone is different. Do not mix up that difference with good and bad, superior and inferior. Whatever differences we may have, we are all equal  We do not walk in order to compete with someone. It is in trying to progress past who one is now that there is value. Do not think about gaining status or honour. When one is trying to be oneself, competition will inevitably get in the way.

Everyone is different here.

Unhappiness is something you choose for yourself. One might say you are lacking in the courage to be happy. When we try to change our lifestyle, we put our great courage to the test. There is the anxiety generated by changing, and the disappointment attendent to not changing Unhappiness can not be blamed on your past or your environment. And it isn't that you lack competence. You just lack courage.

People always choose not to change.

People are not controlled by emotion. They are not controlled by the past People are not driven by past causes, but more toward goals that they themselves set. You should arrive at answers on your own, and not rely upon what you get from someone else. Answers from others are nothing more than stopgap measures ; they are of no value.

Live without being controlled by past

A single book can change your life. Already an enormous bestseller in Asia, with more than 3 million copies sold, The Courage to be Disliked demonstrates how to unlock the power within yourself to be the person you truly want to be. Using the theories of Alfred Adler, one of the three giants of 19th century psychology alongside Freud and Jung, it follows an illuminating conversation between a philosopher and a young man. The philosopher explains to his pupil how each of us is able to determine our own lives, free of the shackles of past experiences, doubts and the expectations of others. It's a way of thinking that's deeply liberating, allowing us to develop the courage to change, and to ignore the limitations that we and those around us can place on ourselves. The result is a book that is both highly accessible and profound in its importance. Millions have already read and benefited from its wisdom. Now that The Courage to be Disliked has been published for the first time in English, so can you

Understand yourself and those around you.

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Love & Relationships

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Ichiro KISHIMI Philosopher, Adlerian psychologist and translator of English and German languages. Born in 1956.M.A.in philosophy from Kyoto University. Director of the Japanese Society of Adlerian psychology. Former counselor at Maeda Clinic in Kyoto and has taught philosophy and ancient Greek at various institutions such as Kyoto University of Education and Nara Women's University. He presently teaches educational psychology and clinical psychology at Meiji School of Oriental Medicine in Suita, Osaka. Kishimi now has his own private counseling office in Kameoka, Kyoto, and devotes his time to giving lectures on Adlerian Psychology and child education.

Ichiro Kishimi

Fumitake Koga is an accomplished writer whose work has resonated with readers around the world. Fumitake Koga has published several books that explore a range of topics, from fiction to nonfiction, and has received critical acclaim for the ability to weave compelling narratives. Fumitake Koga's writing style is known for its depth and authenticity, and has earned quite a loyal following of readers.

Everyone is different here.

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