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The Problem with Coping Skills
Behavioural Activation
This is a method that makes us forcibly do pleasurable and meaningful activities to deliberately feel better, something that can help with depression.
Initially, the person who is suffering may feel worse about the activity he is being forced to do, but once the initial resistance is overcome the person feels better.
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Opting For Quick Emotional Fixes
When people are dealing with a problem, they usually opt for a quick solution, an instant relief that can help them cope up with their anxiety, depression or anger.
Many people follow the pill-popping school of thought, focusing on quick-fix methods and do not look at the long-term implications of the short cuts taken to suppress the mental struggles. But eradicating the problem from the root requires a different approach than these ‘relief’ based techniques.
Going To The Root Of Emotional Problems
Many people take the outward symptoms as the actual problem and think that by fixing the symptom they are fixing the underlying problem too, which is entirely false. Example: Popping pain medication in case of a headache is not the right thing to do if the headaches are increasingly common and severe, as it may be due to some other stress-related problem.
Suppressing or window-dressing the problem will only make it worse. A holistic approach is to dig into the root cause of the problem, which initially may require us to feel worse before we can feel any better.
Behavioural Activation
This is a method that makes us forcibly do pleasurable and meaningful activities to deliberately feel better, something that can help with depression.
Initially, the person who is suffering may feel worse about the activity he is being forced to do, but once the initial resistance is overcome the person feels better.
Avoiding The Addiction To Quick Emotional Fixes
Coping skills or ‘band-aid’ quick-relief methods do have their place as they are effective in the ‘now’, something that most people seem to want.
What makes us feel instantly better now, more often than not is addictive and eventually makes us feel far worse in the future. Much like the car emergency brake, coping skills should be used sparingly.
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You may feel too exhausted to talk, ashamed at your situation, or guilty for neglecting certain relationships. But this is just the depression talking.
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How to reach out for support
- Look for support from people who make you feel safe and cared for. They just need to be a good listener.
- Make face-time a priority. Talking to someone face to face about how you feel can play a big role in relieving depression.
- Try to keep up with social activities even if you don’t feel like it.
- Find ways to support others.
- Caring for a pet can get you outside of yourself and give you a sense of being needed.
- Join a support group for depression.
Do things that make you feel good
Do things that relax and energize you. This includes following a healthy lifestyle, learning how to better manage stress, setting limits on what you’re able to do, and scheduling fun activities into your day.
Even if your depression doesn’t lift immediately, you’ll gradually feel more upbeat and energetic as you make time for fun activities.
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Smartphones and Social Media
Across age groups, social media is potentially hazardous, with its tendency to amplify the social divide.
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