Our unhealthy need for control - Deepstash

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Our unhealthy need for control

Many difficult decisions imply a degree of helplessness and lack of control.

People who make decisions confidently built up a tolerance to feeling helpless and out of control. They’re move on with confidence, without all the stress and anxiety that go along with indecision.

When we're terrified of making mistakes

This happens when you don't possess the knowledge about the consequences of the mistakes in your life now.

Thus, the most important thing for people that want to become more confident decision-makers is to start making some mistakes on purpose. This is train your brain to not see mistake as something dangerous, even if they cause you embarrassment.

Why we are not decisive

Why we are not decisive

The main cause of our trouble with being decisive comes down to this process: cultural conditioning +negative habits.

There are persons that start life from a disadvantaged position in terms of confident decision-making. But we should know that this is still largely constructed not inborn.

Learning to be more decisive

This comes down to pinpointing and getting rid of the habits that increase indecisiveness.

If you feel you struggle to be decisive it's because you've developed habits that increase your lack of confidence when it comes to decision-making.

Uncertainty is a key feature of decision-making

Recognize and accept the fact that you will not be able to control and solve all uncertainty and that you don’t need to. You will be anxious about that, but it's normal.

This will make it much easier for you to simply make a decision and move on.

Reassurance-seeking undercuts confident decision-making

Reassurance-seeking tells your brain that the anxiety that goes along with making decisions is dangerous.

So each time you face a decision that makes you nervous, your brain will make you feel even more nervous.

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