Common belief: “If it doesn’t help me, then forget it” - Deepstash

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5 Common Beliefs that Can Subtly Screw You Over

Common belief: “If it doesn’t help me, then forget it”

Self-improvement has one dangerous drawback: the sense that it's accomplishing something can become a low-level addition. In the process, it will gut your emotional life.

The most meaningful moments in life do not show up on your calendar or to-do list. There is often value in doing something that provides no value. Drink a beer, laugh with a friend, talk to your kid, read a book, then sleep a little too late.

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Positive and destructive perfectionism
Positive and destructive perfectionism

Constructive or healthy perfectionism is a personality trait that is associated with finding enjoyment and fulfilment from doing things well. The focus is process-oriented,...

The roots of destructive perfectionism

A possible explanation of why people develop unhealthy perfectionism is that they grow up without a sense of support, safety, and nurturing. Another reason can be a reaction to childhood trauma or extreme cultural expectations, where appearing perfect is a strategy for survival.

The consequence of destructive perfectionism is often deep-seated emotional difficulties and unresolved traumatic experiences that might eventually turn into a potentially severe depression.

Traits of a perfectly hidden depression syndrome
  1. Your perfectionism is fueled by a constant, critical inner voice of intense shame or fear.
  2. You demonstrate an excessive sense of responsibility and look for solutions.
  3. You are unable to accept and express painful emotions.
  4. You dismiss or discount abuse or trauma.
  5. You worry a lot and avoid situations where you're not in control.
  6. You are highly focused on tasks and expectations and validate yourself with your accomplishments.
  7. You have an active and sincere concern for the wellbeing of others, while seldom allowing anyone into your inner world.
  8. You feel you have to acknowledge your gratitude.
  9. You have emotional difficulty with personal intimacy.
  10. You might have anxiety and control issues, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), generalised anxiety disorder (GAD), panic and eating disorders.
Deliberate Practice
Deliberate Practice

Deliberate practice is the commitment to a thorough concentration of training exercises intended to enhance a specific area of success with immediate feedback and potential for incremental ...

Types of Deliberate Practice
  1. Naive Practice: it is the simple repetition of tasks that doesn't require challenging the mind. It isn't associated with boosting performance levels.
  2. Purposeful Practice: it is a level higher than naive practice because it requires a bigger amount of concentration and constructive criticism.
  3. Deliberate Practice: this requires an intense amount of advanced training with an expert in their specific field. This is rarely done by "normal" people and it practice takes 4-5 hours a day minimum.
The Promise of Deliberate Practice

Engaging in deliberate practice allows you to showcase the best version of yourself. You get to learn so many valuable and useful traits such as patience, grit, and meticulousness.

Whatever skill or sport you want to excel in, deliberate practicing is the best and the fastest way to enhance yourself.

Creativity is exciting
Creativity is exciting

It triggers some degree of surprise or excitement within us and gives us a new way of seeing things that we could not see before.

However, history and science teach us that...

What it means to be creative

Creativity is often thought of as creating something unique. But, most of what we experience as "new" is simply old stuff presented in fresh or unexpected ways.

Creative work also adds some kind of value to the world. If something is novel but doesn't add value, we won't consider it. If it adds value but isn't new, we consider it to be a rip-off.

Combining novelty and value

Combining novelty and value requires a lot of trial and error. It requires feedback. It requires understanding your audience and their values. It requires shaping and perfecting your craft over many years. For every great idea, there are hundreds of failed ideas.

And that is why creativity can get boring. It appears that creativity is really a skill you can practice and get better at.