Key life examples - Deepstash

Key life examples

Psychological reactance is why you hate it when your manager asks you to do a task and you feel you are being micromanaged. However, realtization dawns on you that the task was critical to your work and professional growth.

We often do things against our best interests because we want to protect our freedom to behave the way we want.

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With an awareness about psychological reactance, you have the power to recognize and disarm it.

Instead of flaking on commitments because of a knee-jerk feeling, you can change your perspective on the situation.

By changing the dialogue, you empower yourself. Now you’re in charge. You’re not being told what to do; you’re choosing to make time for something that matters to you.

Disarming psychological reactance takes practice, but it’s worth learning how to deal with this uncomfortable feeling that all too often leads us off track.

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It is not beneficial when, at times, it could prevent us from doing things that we should do — like be helpful to others.

This affects you deeply when you are trying to make, commitments and set goals dor yourself. Example, that impulse of “don’t tell me what to do!” can kick in even when it’s you telling yourself what to do.

This is because, it doesn’t feel like you telling yourself what to do. Rather it’s you from the past, when you made your schedule, telling yourself what to do right now.

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Not something bad, but...

Psychological reactance isn’t really bad.

If you comply everytime with rules and instructions, you tend to be more vulnerable to manipulation.

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Why we do the opposite of what we are supposed to do

We hate the feeling of being bossed around, even when doing as we’re told is good for us.

Psychological reactance is our knee-jerk negative reaction to being told what to do.

Based on research, almost everyone has this mental reflex against being told what to do, especially when we feel that our freedom or autonomy is threatened.

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The Confusion Of Habit and Routine

Habits are programmed human behaviors with little or zero conscious thought. Habits free our minds to other things, but our behavior isn’t always on autopilot. There are many tasks that require concentration, deliberation, and effort, and cannot be simply fed in the brain as an automatic habit.

Behavior that requires conscious thought (like writing a journal every morning) is a routine, not a habit.

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Positive Thinking
  • Recall positive life events.
  • Help others and remind yourself that you can impact the world and feel happier.
  • Practice mindfulness that makes you more present and increases happiness and resilience.
  • Express gratitude by telling people or writing about what you feel thankful for.
  • Identify and remind yourself of your strengths to feel capable and confident. Reflect on the qualities that helped you succeed in the past.
  • Practice forgiveness by letting go of past hurt and anger, but still protect yourself.
  • Find and keep deep real-world social connections to avoid the scientifically proven toll of loneliness and increase well-being.

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Vicious Cycle

Procrastination can become a vicious cycle. Trying to achieve something and failing to act on your intentions can feel frustrating and depressing, and this can then lead to even more procrastination. Research on procrastination confirms that it’s related to negative outcomes – people who are inclined to more procrastination tend to have lower life satisfaction, lower achievement and poorer health.

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