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1. Great listeners create safety
What makes a great listener so magnetic? They know that the basis of any solid connection is something fundamental: safety. At its heart, safety is freedom from risk, danger, or harm. Conversational safety falls right in line, offering freedom from judgment, fault-finding, or rejection.
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3. Great listeners are naturally curious
This is the fun part of listening. Rather than nodding and waiting until it’s their turn to talk, great listeners use their spidey senses to pick up on interesting tidbits. They sit up and take notice of under-the-radar comments or casually dropped breadcrumbs.
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4. Great listeners listen with their entire bodies
Kindergarten teachers impart something called “whole body listening.” It goes like this: Use your eyes to watch nonverbals, your brain to think about what is being said, and your heart to feel emotions—and keep the rest of your body quiet to show respect.
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2. Great listeners validate in a few simple words
In conversation, validating phrases like “Of course you feel that way,” or “That makes total sense,” don’t necessarily convey agreement, but they do convey something even bigger: acceptance, which underscores the sense of safety from Habit #1.
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5. Great listeners read between the lines
Ready for ninja-level listening? Listen to what’s not being said. Maybe the speaker’s face doesn’t match their words: Perhaps they smile while talking about horrible, vulnerable things. Maybe their body language changes suddenl...
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