What makes a great listener so magnetic? They know that the basis of any solid connection is something fundamental: safety. At its heart, safety is freedom from risk, danger, or harm. Conversational safety falls right in line, offering freedom from judgment, fault-finding, or rejection. 

Ready for ninja-level listening? Listen to what’s not being said. Maybe the speaker’s face doesn’t match their words: Perhaps they smile while talking about horrible, vulnerable things. Maybe their body language changes suddenl...

In conversation, validating phrases like “Of course you feel that way,” or “That makes total sense,” don’t necessarily convey agreement, but they do convey something even bigger: acceptance, which underscores the sense of safety from Habit #1.