4. Find Structured Social Activities - Deepstash
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4. Find Structured Social Activities

If you’re an introvert , you may find it difficult to strike up conversations with random people in a coffee shop, bar, or line at the grocery store. This is because these situations are too open-ended, too lacking in structure. They put all the emphasis on talking, which can be awkward and draining when you’re first meeting people.

To ease the pressure, I recommend finding social activities with structure. Here are a few ideas:

  • Boardgame nights (many local breweries, coffee shops, and community centers host these)
  • Sports league
  • Community band/orchestra
  • Meetup groups (though be sure to pick one that’s introvert-friendly)
  • In-person classes (cooking, photography, painting, etc.)
  • etc

The goal is to find an activity that gives you the opportunity to talk but also something else to focus on when the conversation lulls.

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7. Ask Questions

The key, however, is to ask open-ended questions . That is, ask questions that don’t have a simple “yes or no” answer.

It’s the difference between Do you like living here? and What do you think about living here? Or the difference between Where did you...

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6. Embrace the awkwardness

If you’re making an effort to be more social, there are going to be awkward moments.

If you only focus on avoiding awkwardness, then you’ll quickly give up on trying to socialize at all. And this is the opposite of what you want. So instead, I suggest you embrace the awkwardness

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2.Do More Things In Person

These days, there are apps to deliver everything from groceries to toothpaste to tacos. Combine this with services that let you stream more media than you could ever consume in a lifetime, and it’s easy to spend most of your time inside, at home.

  • Shop for groceries in person instead of...

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9. Get Out Of Your Head

Next time you’re having a conversation, see if you catch yourself thinking about what you’re going to say next rather than focusing on what the other person is saying. You may be surprised how often it happens.

Generally, being aware of this tendency is enough to improve it. But if you’re s...

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Practice,Practice, Practice

the more you do it the more it become better.

you can’t build your confidence if you aren’t getting out there and trying.

You can start small, and you can still embrace the alone time you need as an introvert (in fact, you neglect it at your peril).

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3. Take off your headphones

Wearing headphones says, “Please don’t talk to me, I don’t want to be bothered.” This is great when you don’t want your coworkers to interrupt you, but it’s terrible when you want to connect with people.

Putting away the headphones (or taking out the AirPods) opens you up to more social int...

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10. Don't Force Humour

Being funny is a great way to make friends. But not everyone is funny. At least, not everyone is funny all the time. Not everyone has that personality. And that’s okay. You don’t have to be funny to have conversations and build great relationships. There’s room (and need) for serious people in th...

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5. Use "Open" Body Language

When you’re trying to be more social, you should use “open” body language. Open body language signals to others that you’re interested in interacting with them.

So what does this look like in practice? Here are the key components:

  • Uncross your legs and arms
  • Stand (or sit)...

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1. Don't hide behind your phone.

If you want to connect with people, however, you need to put away your phone. It will seem awkward at first, maybe even painful. But if you want to have a conversation, you need to first signal that you’re open to talking.

Putting away your phone sends a signal that you want to talk, and it...

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8. Be A Good Listener

But how do you listen? Effective listening is about more than just passively receiving information. Instead, you need to show the other person that you’re listening.

The following body language shows that you’re listening:

  • Turning toward the person (don’t stare ...

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