Benny Herlambang's Key Ideas from The Cactus and Snowflake at Work
by Devora Zack

Finding where you and others doesnt mean you need to change people, but to know how to deal with them.

See below questions and pick which one you prefer:

1. Your daily to-do list OR make someone else's day
2. For someone you'll never see again, do you care whether they like you OR you strive to have good image
3. Work with direct people OR connected people
4. Direct OR diplomatic
5. Intellect and skill OR emphaty
6. Lead with head OR heart
7. Teams following procedure or teams that feel safe and value effectiveness
8. Leader is ability or caring
9. Contribute directly or by dealing with people10.

10. Under pressure, attention and firmness OR caring and comsoderation?

11. Reason OR compassion

12. Share a bad news plainly OR trying to lighten the impact

13. Analytical OR appreciative

14. Decide based on logic and fairness OR kindness and feeling

15. Value more plain truth and objectivity OR peace and belonging

Count how many questions you pick on first option, more first options means more cactus you are. You rely on head,logic and fairness.

More number of second options means you fall more toward snowflake. You value peace, emphaty and relationship.

Or you are in between, the bridge-builder.

Take perspective of others to find the balance. Cacti might see snowflakes as illogical, but snowflakes see cacti as lack of care.

Treat people not only as you would have them treat you but also as they would like to be treated. Say a simple hello and have a small talk will make a snowflake smiles and feel respected, while direct conversation works better with cacti.

Knowing well how to treat people based on their personality will differentiate you from others who dont know how to do so.

Focus your attention on fine-tuning yourself rather than futilely attempting to fix others. Same experience may be perceived differently by snowflake and cacti.

A group exchange in high energy can be perceived as spirited discussion by cacti but also as a potential conflict by snowflakes.

Control your thinking, what you say and what you do. If you tend to snowflake, trust your feeling. If you are cacti, leverage your logic.

If you are a leader, surround your self with intermix of type. Build a team with a bit balance in number of snowflake and cacti.

Cater your language, use both personality in the right moment. I.e. in meeting, cacti style sometimes is more needed. However, in delivering performance review, snowflake style is needed.

The shadow facet of our personality isn the hidden part of ourselves woth which we dont consiously identify. Awareness of yourself and others allow for interventions that might prevent a shadow state from dominating. In these critical condition, acknowledge people's feelings, ask how you can help and work on coping strategies with them.