You Only Need to Read 5 Books to Change Your Life

I wish I could tell you reading a few books was enough. But that would be a lie. I didn’t know what would work. So, I had to try many things.

After that rainy day, I knew I had to change something — many things, to be fair. But I had no clue where to start from. So, I made the mistake anyone would make on their first time trying to become a better person.

I consumed anything I found. And unfortunately, the worst things attract you the most — especially when you’re suffering.

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I woke up every morning in the same old routine. I knew I had to change. But I couldn’t find the motivation and willpower to get started.

I spent my money on gadgets and distractions. I made excuses, telling myself they would make me feel better. But the next day, I was still broken. The only thing that changed was the summary in my bank account.

I tried to make new friends. But every time I talked with somebody new, I didn’t know what to tell them. I felt like there was nothing special in my life worth sharing. And I was right.

I kept collecting all that knowledge but my life wasn’t improving. So, I decided I had enough — I had to start fresh. I had to start somewhere new. That’s when a friend gifted me The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson.

I got to know Alessio at the university course on Automatic Controllers. And we decided to study together for the exam.

In three months, we bonded a lot. And he understood I was broken, even if I never said anything. After the exam, he wanted to thank me for helping him. So he gifted me The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson.

It may be just me giving it too much value. It might not be anything special. But that was the first book that changed my life. It taught me the philosophy of small daily steps. And it gave me hope.

I never heard about the Growth Rules, the Pareto Principle, or Atomic Habits before. But Olson’s examples on how reading ten pages a day could change my life blew my mind.

It’s a simple book. It doesn’t want to be anything fancy. But it teaches you that daily actions and discipline pay off more than any other strategy.

You may have the best productivity systems ever created. You may also have more free time or financial resources than anyone else. But if you don’t work on your goals daily, they will never come true.

• Small daily habits can make or break your life. If you craft good habits , you will succeed. If you keep bad habits, you will fail.
• Time is a lens — it magnifies your discipline. Everything evolves if you give it enough time.
• Simple plans win over complicated schedules only because they are easier to execute.

I loved The Slight Edge because it gave me hope. For the first time, I was confident I would get my life back.

I wanted to meet new people. I wanted to learn new things and travel the world. It reignited my passion. But it couldn’t do anything with my distracted mind.

For the first two weeks, I tried to build new healthy habits.

• I meditated first thing in the morning and then went for a run.
• In the evening, I wrote a gratefulness journal and read at least 20 pages of a book.

But I couldn’t stop checking my ex’s Instagram profile. I couldn’t get away from my phone and computer. And I desperately needed to find a way because it affected my motivation.

Luckily, in that period, Cal Newport released his bestseller-to-be Digital Minimalism .

Deep Work was the book that taught me how to focus. But I needed Digital Minimalism to get back on track.

I was living in a new stressful situation. I was working on myself and still couldn’t see any results. And worst of all, I couldn’t stop checking my ex’s profiles. I became a digital stalker.

But my smartphone addiction went further. I was also checking on all my friends’ profiles, trying to make contact.

I was desperately searching for someone to talk with. But nobody wanted to talk to me. And it was painful.

Digital Minimalism helped me stop. It helped me understand I was cluttering my mind with useless information that made me miserable. And that I had to declutter my environment.

That was the first time I experienced a 30-day digital declutter challenge.

It was harder than working out every day for a year. But it helped me reconnect with my values and leave out my toxic addiction to my smartphone.

• The first weeks of any detox will hurt like fiery ashes on your skin. But the feeling of success at the end of the journey pays off.
• Spending time alone helps you understand who you are. You can find your purpose only when you remain alone and question yourself and your actions.
• You can leave the house without your phone. In 99% of cases, you will feel like you need it. But in 99% of cases, you will realize you don’t.

I learned how to build habits and focus on them. But still, there are many things in life you can’t foresee.

When I started a new habit or project, I was motivated and ready to do whatever it took. But I didn’t have the patience.

I started my first blog on Medium and wrote for three months. But then, I gave up because I didn’t feel good enough.

I build a running habit for six months. But then, I had to stop for a week and never started over.

Every time I failed, it was heartbreaking. I felt like I was useless. And all my trauma and blaming issues caused by the end of the relationships came to the surface. So, I had to learn how to deal with failure.

Grit was a lucky find.

I bought and downloaded it on my Kobo months earlier. But then, I forgot about it. And one day, I found it in my library.

I still remember empathizing with the author and her relationship with her father. I lived the same things. And only lately, I’ve been building a relationship with my dad.

He also never thought I could make it as a writer. And every time I failed, those memories came back to bite me. But Grit taught me that skill is more important than talent .

• Grit has two components: passion and perseverance. So, you will succeed if you commit to passionate work and never give up.
• You can build passion only if you enjoy the things you do. You have to use a childish approach towards those activities you like and look at them with curiosity.
• Goals must be challenging. Otherwise, you won’t learn anything new. And you will get bored to keep going. But challenges also imply failures. And you have to learn to get over them.

When you feel alone, making new friends is challenging. Or, at least, that’s what happened to me.

I was needy. I wanted to make contact desperately. And I didn’t want to be alone anymore.

I had two good friends, but we never hung out that often. And I never asked them because I was afraid to lose them too. Yet, I had a few opportunities to connect with somebody new. But I didn’t know what to say.

There wasn’t anything in my life worth a story. Or, at least, that’s what I thought. So, every time I was with someone, I would panic. I would say something stupid or uninteresting. They would eventually leave. And I would get back to my solitude.

Then, I read Models by Mark Manson.

Guys would do anything to get laid — it’s not a generalization.

The absence of friends was painful. But the lack of an interesting conversation with a woman in six months was worse.

I had many opportunities — surprisingly, I never missed those. But I didn’t know what to say. I froze even in front of women who clearly stated their interest.

I wanted to become a better communicator. I wanted to become a more interesting person. And that’s what Models did for me — it gave me the blueprint to change my personality.

I don’t know if introverts and extroverts can switch and how often it happens. But from the shy guy in the corner of the room, I became the shining star in the middle of the dance floor. And it was amazing. One of the achievements I am most proud of.

• People empathize with your vulnerability. So, instead of trying to hide your flaws, show them to anyone. They will appreciate your honesty and feel you are more authentic.
• Find your unique style. Don’t fall for trends or branded products — they represent a lack of creativity.
• Polarize people with your behavior and words. Don’t be afraid to behave and say what you think. A reaction is always better than indifference.

It took me a year to fix my communication. But once I did it, there was only one thing left I always wanted to try — personal finance.

Everybody wishes to become rich. But it becomes necessary when you live half of your life in poverty. And it is so hardcoded in your brain that you can’t even spend a cent without calculating how much you worked for it.

My parents sacrificed their friends and families to come here in Italy. They wished to give me and my sister better opportunities. And they succeeded — we both have good jobs. But the fear of getting back to poverty never gets away.

I read many books on personal finance and investing. But The Psychology of Money will always be my favorite because it explains how humans think about money.

Before getting my first job, I read a few things about investing. And I knew the more I waited, the longer it would take me to multiply my net worth. So, as I got my first job in 2019, I invested almost all of my money in an aggressive wallet.

But I made a mistake.

A few months later, COVID happened. The markets were crushed. And my wallet reached a minimum of -15%.

It was painful to see all my money losing value every day. But thanks to The Psychology of Money , I resisted. And five years later, the trend inverted, and my wallet reached +17%.

• All of us have the potential to get richer. But we have to keep our emotions under control and follow a cold investing strategy even if it doesn’t pay off immediately.
• Anyone can start saving money with the right mindset. But not everybody wants to do it.
• History can only teach you what happened in the past. In finance, history is rarely an indicator of future success or failure.

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• Want more? Explore my other work at Cosmopolitan Mindset.