How to Be Excellent (or at Least Pretty Good) at Canceling Plans - Deepstash
How to Be Excellent (or at Least Pretty Good) at Canceling Plans

How to Be Excellent (or at Least Pretty Good) at Canceling Plans

Curated from: thecut.com

Ideas, facts & insights covering these topics:

6 ideas

·

870 reads

7

Explore the World's Best Ideas

Join today and uncover 100+ curated journeys from 50+ topics. Unlock access to our mobile app with extensive features.

Do it rarely

If you choose to use strategies for conscientiously flaking, try to do it rarely. 

If you have to do it often, it’s probably because you’re saying yes to too many things and the real problem is not how to get out of stuff but how to say no in the first place.

94

240 reads

'Not feeling so well'

This approach is fine, as long as it's true. It’s always good to give a reason why you’re bailing, especially when that reason is truthful and specific. Also, deliver your excuse over the phone or in person, so there’s less room for it to get lost in translation.

For example, “I’m not feeling up for it tonight” may not sound ok in your head, but it’s definitely more effective than “something came up.”

59

126 reads

Think a few steps ahead

  • If a last-minute emergency prevents you from missing a moderately important gathering, be sure to still send a gift and a handwritten note.
  • Be sure to mention you're sorry for not making it and don't put the person that invited you.
  • Don't fish for validation, but validate them. Reiterate the fact that you value your relationship and that you are not rejecting them permanently.

71

117 reads

Stay off social media

When you cancel plans, the goal is to walk away completely unscathed, and that means avoiding both guilt and FOMO, so stay off social media. 

If you had to skip a party for a last-minute family thing and instead sulked over Instagrams depicting the fun you could've been having — not ideal.

69

179 reads

Ask for help when deciding

If you really want to commit to transparency, you can incorporate your friend into your decision-making process, which also lets you test the waters to determine the best course of action.

Present your friend with your dilemma, and let him/her weigh in. If they seem upset and hurt by the prospect of your canceling, try to make it happen. If they seem totally understanding, go ahead and cancel.

58

90 reads

Don't make it a habit

Even the most understanding friend will only be understanding so many times. Your reputation and your relationships will eventually suffer.

And when you do bail, set concrete plans for next time — and stick to them. 

67

118 reads

IDEAS CURATED BY

mia_w

Social media lover and beer specialist. Love cats.

Mia 's ideas are part of this journey:

The Philosophy Of Alan Watts

Learn more about communication with this collection

Understanding the concept of the self

The importance of living in the present moment

The illusion of control

Related collections

Read & Learn

20x Faster

without
deepstash

with
deepstash

with

deepstash

Personalized microlearning

100+ Learning Journeys

Access to 200,000+ ideas

Access to the mobile app

Unlimited idea saving

Unlimited history

Unlimited listening to ideas

Downloading & offline access

Supercharge your mind with one idea per day

Enter your email and spend 1 minute every day to learn something new.

Email

I agree to receive email updates