Keep reading for FREE
Perhaps you were not at the top of the class, not the employee of the month, nor are you the "10" you think your partner wants. But you're probably pretty spectacular in some way, and definitely good enough in most areas of life. If ever there were a time to stop beating yourself up for being human, it is now.
The pursuit of success is a religion because, like other religions, it is a robust system of meaning-making that operates at emotional and cognitive levels, guides our decisions, contains its own morality, and is practiced en masse by a group of people sharing a largely unexamined ideology.
Enjoying the knowledge of one’s own enoughness while also honoring the imperative to possess some degree of social status might be the key to maintaining balance.
It seems we have created a distorted view of being average, and consequently, we try to avoid it at all costs.
A study on averageness shows just how skewed our perspective is. Participants overall tended to label their own abilities as above average, but the study also found evidence that people consider average as being synonymous with having below-average abilities rather than interpreting the term with its literal definition.
A widely circulated “motivational” message, for example, proclaimed: If you didn’t come out of this quarantine with either a new skill or a new business, you never lacked the time, you just lacked the discipline.
It’s a message that’s counterproductive. It denies the kind of dramatic learning we have had to contend with every day just to make it through our pandemic routine—learning to work at the kitchen table or use new collaboration platforms, being without colleagues, friends, and family.
Mom guilt is something that almost all mothers are very familiar with.
Research suggests that five basic situations tend to induce guilt in mothers: actual or imagined aggression, wanting to leave in some way, being gone in some way, favoring one child over another, not corresponding to your own or others’ idea of a good mother.
Guilt is the byproduct of striving for perfect parenting and perfect doesn’t work in relationships. What works is flexibility, responsive sensitivity, and availability.
Having a good-enough partner implies making some compromises that are contrary to the portayal of romance.
Good relationship compromises include settling for a good-enough relationship, while continuing to improve it. When we think of our partner as good enough, we realize what is most valuable for us. This does not mean that people should not aim to increase the depth of their relationship, but that such improvement will mainly relate to developing the connection with our current, good-enough partner.
MORE LIKE THIS
Ready for the next level?
Read Like a Pro
Explore the World’s
Take Your Ideas
Just press play and we take care of the words.
No Internet access? No problem. Within the mobile app, all your ideas are available, even when offline.
2 Million Stashers
This app is LOADED with RELEVANT, HELPFUL, AND EDUCATIONAL material. It is creatively intellectual, yet minimal enough to not overstimulate and create a learning block. I am exceptionally impressed with this app!
Best app ever! You heard it right. This app has helped me get back on my quest to get things done while equipping myself with knowledge everyday.
Great interesting short snippets of informative articles. Highly recommended to anyone who loves information and lacks patience.
Don’t look further if you love learning new things. A refreshing concept that provides quick ideas for busy thought leaders.
Even five minutes a day will improve your thinking. I've come across new ideas and learnt to improve existing ways to become more motivated, confident and happier.
Brilliant. It feels fresh and encouraging. So many interesting pieces of information that are just enough to absorb and apply. So happy I found this.
Great for quick bits of information and interesting ideas around whatever topics you are interested in. Visually, it looks great as well.
I have only been using it for a few days now, but I have found answers to questions I had never consciously formulated, or to problems I face everyday at work or at home. I wish I had found this earlier, highly recommended!
Read & Learn
Access to 200,000+ ideas
Access to the mobile app
Unlimited idea saving & library
Unlimited listening to ideas
Downloading & offline access
Claim Your Limited Offer
Get Deepstash Pro