When there is an argument in any relationship, an ordinary person tries to resolve the problem by taking responsibility for the part they played or understand the other person's point of view to have a minimum common ground. However, when it comes to narcissists, they deliberately twist your words and pretend to misunderstand you. This tactic is known as arguing in bad faith and this is one of their favorite tactics because it allows them to escape accountability and deflect all blame on you.
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One of the most aggressive tactics narcissists use to dominate the conversation and prove that they are right is by provoking, intimidating or bullying you convertly or overtly. They yell at you, call names, get loud and violent during the conversation. When either of the above occurs, you get triggered and may react back in defence, which fuels them.
The pathological narcissist intentionally uses the word Salad to manipulate you so that you question yourself rather than questioning them. They use the Word Salad to create confusion to control the conversation. They become extremely upset or aggressive, believing that you are illogical, unreasonable, uneducated and unable to have a mature conversation with them or understand their non-sensical gibberish. This further twists the victim's reality making them more prone to manipulation.
As an attempt to confuse other people and make them doubt their experiences, narcissist deliberately lie about what they did or what you did to make the target lose the ability to make safe and appropriate decisions.
A narcissist deflects to avoid taking responsibility for their behaviour and place that responsibility on their victim. The cause of deflection is simple. They don't want to face the truth about their thoughts, actions, or transgressions. For them, it is easier to blame others and not take responsibility for their actions. The various ways they do it are gas lighting, denying, lying, justifying, deflection, bullying, bluffing, and flat out threatening if their false self is threatened.
A pathological narcissist loves to talk about himself, often in exaggerated and grandiose terms.
Common conversational topics for narcissists include accomplishments and achievements, exciting and envy-worthy activities, excessive focus on personal issues and concerns, excessive focus on looks and materialism, and putting others down to show one’s own superiority.
Manipulators become bullies when they intimidate or harms others, and pick on people they perceive as weaker. But standing up to bullies often cause them to retreat.
When confronting bullies, be sure to place yourself in a position where you can safely protect yourself, whether it’s standing tall on your own, having other people present to witness and support, or keeping a paper trail of the bully’s inappropriate behavior.
The world of the narcissist is all about good/bad, superior/inferior, and right/wrong. There is a definite hierarchy, with the narcissist at the top—which is the only place he feels safe.
Narcissists can also get that superior feeling by being the worst; the wrongest; or the most injured.
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