Pitfalls to avoid
- Watch your posture. The most effective one is with your feet together and palms down or letting them move with the words.
- Don't get nasty. Validate your opponent's self-worth by being nice to them so they will be more receptive.
- Avoid using too many facts. People think emotionally, so moral intuitions often weight stronger than factual accuracy.
MORE IDEAS FROM THE ARTICLE
- Know your facts thoroughly.
- Use scientific-looking visuals (elements that people associate with science, like formula or graphs).
- Demonstrate that other people agree.
- Using phrases that indicate a degree of uncertainty makes you seem more interesting interested in finding the truth than in winning arguments.
- End your sentences with verbal affirmations (e.g." isn't it?").
- Lower the pitch of your voice. It improves your powers of persuasion.
- Instead of attacking someone's ideas, try taking your opponent's basic beliefs and developing them into an absurd conclusion.
- Flag your opponent's' dangerous beliefs. It may have a positive effect on neutralizing your opponent.
- Identify the shared ground between you and give genuine praise.
If you mimic your opponent (in a subtle way), they are more likely to believe you.
For example, if they are sitting cross-legged, wait a few seconds and cross your legs too. And make sure that what you are doing is not too obvious.
To gain trust and build rapport, you need to hear out what the other person thinks without interrupting or disagreeing.
Try asking open-ended questions, like: "Why do you think that?"
Repeating an argument back to the speaker can develop trust by proving that you're listening.
Try paraphrasing what you understand, using: " so you're suggesting ... because... ?"
...while you listen. This makes the speaker's arguments less persuasive, which makes your opinion look strong.
Fix the speaker in your sight as soon as they start speaking.
RELATED IDEAS
- Stay calm.
- Use facts as evidence for your position.
- Ask questions. If you can ask the right questions you can stay in control of the discussion and make your opponent scramble for answers.
- Use logic. Show how one idea follows another.
- Listen carefully.
- Be prepared to concede a good point.
- Study your opponent. Know their strengths & weaknesses.
- Do not get personal. Attacks on your opponent’s lifestyle, integrity or honesty should be avoided. Attack the issue not the person.
Being confident is the key to a succesful explanation.
- Speak confidently, be concise, and try not to repeat yourself.
- Give the appearance that you truly know what’s right from the beginning, even if you don’t have all of the facts.
- Facts that can support your stance is helpful, but being convincing matters more.
- People think emotionally, so forget facts.
- When people are asked to explain their beliefs about how a given thing works, they’ll actually become less confident in those beliefs.
- When people have their self-worth validated in some way, they tend to be more receptive to information that challenges their beliefs.
- During a debate, you’re more likely to make progress if you can appeal to the moral concerns of the people that you’re talking with.