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How to Make People Think of You for Opportunities
People's impression of you
If the people you know had to describe you and your deal, what would they say? What do you want them to say?
Clarifying people’s impressions of you doesn’t mean being fake, it actually means being yourself —being the person you want to think of yourself as.
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Key Ideas
Benefiting from networking
If you’ve ever gotten a job or a gig because someone “thought of you,” you’ve benefited from networking.
Good networking doesn’t require anything slimy or selfish. It requires that you define yourself. And that means paying more attention to how you act when you meet or catch up with people.
People's impression of you
If the people you know had to describe you and your deal, what would they say? What do you want them to say?
Clarifying people’s impressions of you doesn’t mean being fake, it actually means being yourself —being the person you want to think of yourself as.
Describing your work
Think about the best definition of your work, your status, and your goals. Practice it a bit, to have something to say when people ask you what you’re up to. Everyone would prefer hearing a little bit of a pitch than hearing “eh, kind of nothing, except a little of this, but it’s not important, and I don’t really know...” Give them something to hook onto, to remember, and when they next hear about a relevant idea or opportunity, to “think of you.”
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Defining excuses
Excuses are rationalizations we make to ourselves about people, events, and circumstances.
They are invented reasons we create to defend our behavior, to postpone taking action or simpl...
The Fear Trap
We make excuses for the following key reasons:
- Fear of Failure
- Fear of Embarrassment
- Fear of Success
- Fear of Change
- Fear of Uncertainty
- Fear of Responsibility
- Fear of Making Mistakes
- Perceived lack of confidence or resources
'There’s just not enough time'
It suggests the wrong priorities or time management problems. It could also indicate laziness or procrastination.
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Take The Lead
Many back off from taking the lead out of fear of not being leadership material. But if you take it upon yourself to lead with the idea of serving others, you will not only stand out ...
Have a Positive Mindset
People gravitate toward those who have a positive attitude. The person who takes on even the most tedious task enthusiastically stands out.
Living things through a negative lens often leads to a negative mindset, but cultivating a positive attitude will take you far.
Go The Extra Mile
Don’t just do your job. You can make an impact by going further and being more helpful, more supportive, more valuable.
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“What is a good man but a bad man’s teacher? What is a bad man but a good man’s job? If you don’t understand this,..."
Lao Tzu
Take every experience as a lesson
Whenever you find yourself in an unpleasant or difficult situation, try to see what you can take away from this very experience.
Try to perceive your experiences as lessons and to understand them, so you can feel at ease with the others and with yourself.
Read between the lines
Whenever you deal with difficult people, take into account two aspects: you should not let their actions affect your life in a negative way and you may want to try first to understand them, rather than just to judge them.
After all, they might be fighting a battle you know nothing about.
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The right time to ask
- How is the financial health of the company? If the company is not doing well, this is not the time to ask for a raise.
- How is your manager’s workload? If your manag...
Get salary trends
Every job has a market value.
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Compare what you’re currently being paid to the trends you find.
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Consider your education, years of experience, years you’ve worked for your current employer and any specialized skills or attributes you bring to the table.
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Make a list of your accomplishments, taking note of which ones added the most value to the organization
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Identify a salary range or percentage increase in pay that you’d be happy with.
Set a meeting
Meet in person and in private.
You should approach asking for a raise with the same level of seriousness you would have for a job interview or an important presentation, and you should dress accordingly.
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Key Ideas
Mindsets around new conversations
Go into a situation where you will need to speak with people with the mindset of, "I am curious and I want to learn more about other people", rather than going into it with the mindset...
Listen with intent
The best conversationalists aren’t those who always have witty things to say, but those who are genuine listeners.
Good listeners don’t just listen with their ears, but with their whole body. They lean into the conversation, establish eye contact, and provide their undivided attention to the person they’re speaking with.
Ask open-ended questions
Those that require more than a “yes” or “no” answer, are the best type of questions to ask if you’re looking to establish common ground.
Just be careful not to overdo your questioning. You don’t want the other person to feel like they’re being interrogated.
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Avoid tension and build rapport
This underscores the importance of starting on the right foot. If you upset the person you’re trying to help, they’ll wall themselves off.
It's important to use empath...
Focus on collaboration
To get someone to act on your advice, it’s going to mean giving up at least some of the credit for it.
When the person receiving your advice feels like they had a hand in creating it—with guidance from you, the expert, of course—they’re far more likely to act on it.
Show your work
In this case, you’re showing your work because it instills trust, and trust is critical for acceptance.
When you show you work, the person you’re advising doesn’t have to take your recommendations on blind faith. They can see exactly how you got to your advice and buy into it along the way.
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Key Idea
FBI's 5-Step Negotiation Strategy
- Active Listening: Just defending your proposal puts you at odds with your counterpart. Listening "without judging" and ensuring the other knows you're doing so lets you under...
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Asking For Help
Not wanting to seem weak, needy, and incompetent or like we’re taking advantage often keeps us from asking for help, but that’s often an overblown fear caused by our tendency to think the worst....
Seeking Help Is Strength
By taking an active step in seeking help or advice, you’re actually taking control of your life, and not letting external circumstances (such as what people think) affect how you behave and perform. It is courageous to accept your weaknesses.
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"The best book, like the best speech, will do it all – make us laugh, think, cry and cheer – preferably in that or..."
Madeleine Albright
Public speaking key points
- Acoustics are the most important part of a speech delivery . Keep your voice clear and consistent to keep you audience engaged.
- Content is crucial. Well thought out content with good articulation is essential for a great speech.
- The best speeches are emotional, because they are powerful. Communicate anger, sadness, love, joy or excitement, in a meaningful, authentic and impactful way.