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New Neuroscience Reveals 5 Rituals That Will Make You Happy - Barking Up The Wrong Tree
Define Your Close Circle
Some questions to help you:
- “Who appreciates you or thinks highly of you, whether or not you agree with them?”
- “Who is there to help you out if needed?”
- “Who can you call, text or visit for emotional support?”
- “Who is good with giving you advice or helping you make decisions?”
- “Who do you like spending time with?”
- “Who can you do activities with?”
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Key Ideas
Feelings are summary judgments
Most of the time we don’t second guess them, and even if we do, they often end up overwhelming us.
Negative feelings are very powerful and harder to question: we identify with them effo...
Misunderstanding resilience
Resilience is most times associated with being tough. But that’s not gonna get you very far with feelings. Don't try to be invulnerable. Aim for flexibility instead.
You cannot avoid or resist all pain in life. But you can learn to live with your discomfort better.
"Solving" emotions
We have trouble dealing with feelings because the usual problem-solving rules don't really apply to them.
When faced with a problem, we can always avoid it or deny it. But attempting to resist negative feelings won’t work. Any attempt at suppression only amplifies them. We must go from avoidance to acceptance.
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Key Ideas
Cherish your life
Everybody is aware, in a certain measure, of the different truths life provides us with. One of them, which is also the scariest, is related to the fact that eventually, we all die.
How...
Work hard, live longer
One of the biggest truths you will ever come to realize is that hard work, ambition and targets give actual meaning to your life.
Furthermore, once you have given a purpose to your work, you will most certainly see that motivation goes a long way into making someone's life more interesting to live.
There is a limit to happiness
Whoever believes that happiness knows no bound is in for a big surprise: happiness, like everything in this world, knows limits and very often we perceive this fact maybe just a bit too harsh.
In order to enjoy life and to get to feel happy, as much as it is possible, one should first be able to deal with difficult situations. Therefore, maturity tends to be seen as the key to ensuring a satisfactory life.
6
Key Ideas
Narcissists
They have inflated views of themselves (they think they are better than they actually are).
They make fantastic first impressions. But the stuff that works for narcissists so well in the sho...
Don't deal with them
Narcissists lack empathy, they usually don’t work hard, and in a few weeks to a few months, they make the people around them miserable. And narcissism is very hard to change. So, if at all possible, just stay away.
Kiss Up Or Shut Up
Clinical psychologist Al Bernstein recommends you kiss up to them or at least keep your mouth shut until you can get out of there.
There’s this concept called “narcissistic injury.” Pointing out a narcissist isn’t all they think they are can be like pulling the pin on a grenade. A grenade you have to see every day of your life.