Keep your emotions under control
Emotions play an important role in the conflict by altering how you appraise the situation.
Stay calm and don't lose your temper. If you lose your temper, you’ll only antagonize your opponent, which will further heighten his or her wrath.
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If you appear to be giving the other side’s position a thoughtful review, then the solution you propose will seem to be far more sensible. Furthermore, your opponent may come to your side without you having to do anything other than listening.
Showing empathy will lower the temperature of the debate and allow both of you to come to a resolution.
Stop and think before you make such errors, and you’ll be less likely to lose, whether the matter is trivia or a truly important career or relationship challenges.
Hope allows you to come up with creative solutions to the disputes at the core of the conflict.
You may see a way out of what seems to be a locked battle of wills. This is what happens in ordinary problem-solving, when thinking outside of the box can help all sides come up with a solution.
- A successful argument within a relationship remains compartmentalized. Don’t let it lead to questioning the entire basis of the relationship.
- Don’t insult or degrade your opponent. Show that you meant “nothing personal” in the dispute.
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Amazing leaders are not interested in winning for their own ego. They understand that finding the truth benefits the whole team so everyone can win.
Open your mind and look for answers, not victory.
- Speak confidently, be concise, and try not to repeat yourself.
- Give the appearance that you truly know what’s right from the beginning, even if you don’t have all of the facts.
- Facts that can support your stance is helpful, but being convincing matters more.
Saying things like 'I understand why you'd feel that way...' or 'Anyone would feel like that in the same situation' validates the other person's emotions and completely disarms them.