Fear of an event in another time and place

• If I had more time, I would do X.
• If I say or do X, people will think I’m stupid.
• If I just say or do X, then that person will finally change.
• Everything is great/Everything sucks.
• There’s something inherently wrong or different about me.
• I would change, but I can’t because of X.
• I can’t live without X.
• I know what I’m doing.

Until two decades ago, the general goal of colleges was for academic pursuits and teaching individuals to become more well-rounded. The general thought was that colleges were not vocational institutions.

Now, and possibly in the future, colleges will have to focus more on training and change their curriculum to meet the demands of employers.

A four-year college education remains the best choice for those who can get admitted to a selective university. But for everyone else, an alternative path might be the best way to go.

In the future, one training path will be company-sponsored apprenticeship programs to cover the skills missing between the secondary system and what employers are looking for.

"Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy."

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do."

This is the fear of losing any part of our bodily structure or the thought of having our body's boundaries invaded.

Anxiety about animals, such as bugs, spiders, snakes, and other creepy things arises from fear of mutilation.

The fear of being immobilized, restricted, overwhelmed, entrapped, smothered, or otherwise controlled by circumstances beyond our control. 

Fear of intimacy, or "fear of commitment," is basically fear of losing one's autonomy.

Finding a suitable therapist, right for both the partners can take time. Take into consideration:

• Both partners are comfortable with the choice.
• Any preferences (gender or cultural background) are taken into account.
• It should be convenient to schedule an appointment with him, not interfering with other commitments too much.
• At least two kinds of counselors are spoken to, and then a decision taken.
• Check online for recommendations or ask for a referral within your friend circle.

A good therapist can utilize multiple approaches and will tailor the provided therapy based on the couple's needs. The common therapies are:

• Gottman Method: Focused on positive communication
• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): helps couples with their emotional needs.
• Imago Relationship Therapy: Connecting new relationships with old ones.
• Other approaches like Hypnosis, sex therapy, etc.

The mind needs variety and diverse types of stimuli at different times. Reading several books at once, of different genres is a smart way to be able to cater to the mind's different needs at different times. It is also a good idea to not have more than a few books in your current reading list. The recommended number is 3.

If reading a certain book is beginning to feel like a burden to you, you are free to let go. The reason can be any, but it is no use wasting your time in a book that isn't speaking to you.

Letting go of a book provides closure and unburdens your mind.

Tying your self-worth to everyone else’s opinions gives you a flawed sense of reality because people judge us based on a pool of influences in their own lives that have absolutely nothing to do with us.

We need to learn from the past, but also to be ready to update what we learned based on how our circumstances have changed.

There is clinical evidence for mindfulness-based cognitive therapy as a way to prevent depression and anxiety.

Mindfulness may be good for other psychiatric conditions including bipolar disorder.

There is also growing evidence that mindfulness is effective for chronic long-term health conditions.

Mindfulness is not a cure all. With all the hype around mindfulness it can sometimes be difficult to tell whether the information is quality-controlled and reliable. We need  to be careful not to overstate it's usefulness.

A recent study showed that men overestimate how good-looking they are to women. Women, on the other hand, think they are less attractive to men, which is not the case.

People who think they are highly attractive may incorrectly assume that the other person is sexually interested in them.

Men look for signs or attraction more than women do, like it has always been. Men initiate the love and take the lead, deciding to move out of a platonic relationship faster than women.

When we get rejected, our brains register an emotional chemical response so strong, it can physically hurt. 

We go through almost the same stages as if we were grieving (self-blame, trying to win back our rejecter because we hate being disliked, and feeling like a failure). These feelings are healthy and normal, so long as you don’t end up dwelling on them.

Rejection is personal, and it’s easy to start questioning your self-worth when someone makes it clear they don’t like you. 

But for the most part, being disliked is a matter of mutual compatibility. Keep in mind that likability has a lot to do with what you bring to someone else’s table, whether or not you realize it.