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10 Simple Habits That Will Noticeably Improve Your Social Skills
Remember people's stories
Remember the names of people's family members, pets, hobbies, details about the job, a side gig, what are they obsessed with, remember as much as you can.
People appreciate when they realize that you actually listened to them and remembered their story.
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Key Ideas
Listen to people
Most people are not listening, but rather trying to be the loudest person in the room.
If you ask questions and listen, you are extremely likely to stand out from the crowd.
Be interested in people's stories
Interested people are interesting. Ask people questions.
Try to learn something you did not know before from your interlocutor.
Find where you interact better
This is an important distinction and knowing how you function best will help you create the best environment for your social skills to shine.
Don't be too negative
... or ironic and don't complain all the time.
All of these behaviors are people repellent. We naturally gravitate towards people who are kind, loving, cheerful, and funny, rather than to those who complain all the time.
Remember people's names
Ask people to repeat their names. If it's hard, ask them to spell it for you. Repeat after them.
If you forget, ask someone else from the group, "Hey, what was the name of the guy in a red shirt? I forgot." Do whatever you have to do to remember. And then call people by their names. People love that.
Remember people's stories
Remember the names of people's family members, pets, hobbies, details about the job, a side gig, what are they obsessed with, remember as much as you can.
People appreciate when they realize that you actually listened to them and remembered their story.
Don't fill every gap with talking
Conversations are two-way streets.
However, sometimes it's perfectly fine to say, "Wow, that's really cool." You don't always need to have a follow-up story, or the answer or the opinion. Ask your interlocutor another question. Nod your head. Be silent.
Follow up
The truest power of networking lies in following up. That is how relationships are built.
Try to come up with the recommendation during the conversation and then promise to follow up with the link/recipe/code/useful person's contact, etc. And do it. This will show that you are caring, diligent, consistent, and reliable.
Know when to leave
Nobody wants to chat only with you for hours.
Have a nice conversation and move on.
The ultimate social skill
Love people, respect people, admire people, be interested in what people are going through, compliment people, see the best in people, forgive people, don't judge people, help people, shower people with your love.
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
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Convey genuine appreciation
Actively project warmth and high energy. People like you when they feel liked by you.
To make it clear you’re interested in the other person, think about what they know that you don...
Listen with intent
Being a good listener is about two things:
- Demonstrating that you’ve heard exactly what was said by the other person.
- Encouraging them to continue. This breaks down into what’s called “backchanneling” — offering short, enthusiastic responses as the other person talks (i.e. “yeah” “mm-hmm” “totally” “I can see that”), and asking follow up questions that reference the information you were just given.
Use humility markers
Acknowledging your own fallibility and human imperfection can go a long way toward making yourself relatable. Especially if there’s a power dynamic where someone is asking for your advice, attention or help, you want to put the other person at ease.
Taking the time to call or meet in person also expresses humility.
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Tips for being more likeable in social situations
- Don't overshare your whole life's story.
Actually listen to what people say. Then respond accordingly.
Remember people's name...
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The 2 most important networking skills
...you can develop are listening and asking questions.
These 2 skills will impress your clients even more than your best business statistics.
How to Be a Good Listener
Good listening is active, not passive:
- Maintain eye contact.
- Do not fidget, shift your body weight often, and never look at your watch!
- Nod your head to show agreement but do not interrupt to make your point or share your own experiences.
- Respond by repeating at least one key point the person you are talking with just made in the form of a question.
How to Ask the Right Questions
Keep questions positive and focused.
Ask a question that is on-topic whenever possible. If the topic is negative, do not just suddenly change topics. It will make the speaker uncomfortable. Instead, give an empathetic reply to show support and then ask a question to redirect to something that is still related, but allows the speaker to respond with something a little more positive.