A self-centered worldview will have you chasing boogeymen where they don’t exist.
Stop psycho-analyzing every word choice your partner makes and be more present in the moment so you can notice the message behind their tone, physical presence, and posture. Obsessing with hidden meanings is a sure-fire way to miss the point.
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Have you ever found thinking negative thoughts like, “I know they’ll get sick of me someday,” or, “How could they love me?”
These thoughts have little to do with reality but a lot to do with fear.
A little baggage is totally okay, but you need to lighten your load before jumping into any new relationship.
Let go of any left-over hurtful feelings that might be lingering and realize that your new relationship is a new opportunity to put all of that behind you.
When someone blames you for something that you don’t think is your fault, you probably get defensive.
If you have a problem, don’t immediately point the finger, but instead approach your partner with compassion and understanding. Be comfortable in the fact that neither of you is fully “right” or “wrong.” The true answer lies somewhere in the middle.
Avoid the temptation to snoop your partner’s phone, Facebook messages, or email account.
While this could temporarily calm your nerves when you see nothing afoul, it is also a behavior that could quickly become addictive, not to mention damaging for relationship trust.
Don't put them off. While conflict is stressful for your relationship in the short-term, it will build the strength of your relationship in the long-term.
Never mince words with each other and you will develop trust so strong that you can tell your partner anything that is on your mind.
Just like you shouldn’t invite a friend to your home while it’s a disorganized wreck, you shouldn’t invite a partner into your life while it is in disarray.
Take care of your inner-house before you invite anyone else to it.
Just like your body needs wholesome food to be fueled, your brain needs continued challenges to keep on evolving.
Make sure you learn something new every day. Start learning a new language, watch inspiring TED talks, solve a riddle—just make sure you use your brain every day.
Turning something upside-down, whether physically or just by re-imagining it, can help you see new patterns.
The brain has pattern-making habits that may obscure other, more subtle patterns at work; changing the orientation of things can hide the more obvious patterns and make other patterns emerge.