Reassurance-seeking is essentially outsourcing the hard work of managing difficult emotions to someone else.
If you habitually shirk the responsibility of managing your own painful emotions, you’re telling your brain that you can’t handle them yourself.
I mean, why would your brain trust you if that’s the message it’s getting all the time?
Obviously, there’s nothing wrong with leaning on other people for emotional support sometimes. But if you do it to the exclusion of working through things yourself, it’s a setup for low self-trust.
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If you want to trust yourself more, learn to identify the habits in your life that are interfering with self-trust and work to eliminate them:
Perfectionism isn’t about doing perfect, it’s about feeling perfect.
Most perfectionists will freely admit that their excessive standards for achievement are totally unrealistic. But they keep holding themselves to them… Why?
Because deep down perfectionism is less about being afraid of failure itself and more about having a low tolerance for feeling like a failure.
Worry is fundamentally different than effective planning and problem-solving.
By definition, worry is unhelpful thinking about negatives in the future. Planning and problem-solving can be difficult because they’re negative, but they lead to results—they’re productive and generative.
Worry gives us the illusion of control.
But ultimately it’s a trap: You can’t control nearly as much as you would like.
Culturally, we tend to put emotions up on a pedestal and romanticize them. But in reality, they are just one of many aspects of the human experience—not any more special or authoritative than any other mental capacity like sensation, perception, or logical thinking.
Your emotions will lead you astray just as often as they will help you.
A new joinee has to showcase the skills he possesses and at the same time, build the foundation of a good relationship with the new coworkers.
Establishing trust is important to ensure success in one’s new job role.
“Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.” ~Steve Jobs
We often grow up internalizing fear, anger, guilt, shame, helplessness and a feeling of being unsafe in the world. Overwhelmed, we push the pain away and put on masks in order to survive. This isolates us and disconnects us from ourselves and the world around us, keeping us small, scared, and unfulfilled.
Reclaiming your sense of self and the ability to trust your feelings and intuition is not only paramount to healing but also creating a fulfilling life.
People with a lot of self-discipline understand that willpower is a last resort.
Willpower should never be a primary strategy for accomplishing difficult things.
Better to avoid temptations in the first place than trying to resist them.
How would I achieve my goals if I had zero willpower?
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