Realistic optimism - Deepstash
Handling Difficult People

Learn more about personaldevelopment with this collection

How to communicate effectively with difficult people

How to handle conflict

How to stay calm under pressure

Handling Difficult People

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Realistic optimism

Ask yourself two simple questions when you feel you’re being treated badly or unfairly.

  • What are the facts in this situation?
  • What’s the story I’m telling myself about those facts? What do I really want as an outcome?

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3.85K reads

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Leveraging self-control

Have a clear sense of self, what causes you tension and where your limits are.

  • Seek to understand the situation. Gain some clarity by asking questions while managing your own reactions.
  • Stick to the facts and acknowledge emotions. 
  • Paraphrase and ch...

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Managing your reactions

It is all about breathing. Slow, deep breathing actually triggers something at the bottom of your spine called the Vegus nerve, which sends neurotransmitters to the brain that actually calm you down.

Take a moment to reflect on how you feel. Ask yourself questions about how you can res...

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3.02K reads

The long lens

Sometimes your worst fears about another person turn out to be true. She invariably takes credit for your work. When this occurs, begin with this question:

  • Regardless of how I feel about what’s happening right now, how can I grow and learn from this experience?

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When Nothing Works

Take care of yourself.

By modeling well-being practices, you not only do good for your own mind and body, but you eliminate second-hand stress for all those around you. 

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Identifying Difficult People

Identifying Difficult People

  • The Perfectionist. If you are looking for quick results, perfectionists can be a source of frustration.
  • Control freaks. When you want to do things your way, overly controlling types can be a source of irritation as well.
  • Cr...

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Identifying the Issue

Turn the situation inward and analyze your triggers and reactions to these situations. 

  • How do you react to a difficult person in your life?
  • How does your difficult person react to your reactions?
  • If the other person is the problem, are you growing unhealthy acti...

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Mitigating These Situations

Separate the facts from your assumptions. 

Separate yourself and your reactions from the negative emotions you may be feeling in the moment. 

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The reverse lens

Viewing the world through the lens of the person who triggered you. It doesn’t mean sacrificing your own point of view but rather widening your perspective. 

Ask yourself:

  • What is this person feeling, and in what ways does that make sense?
  • Where’s my respon...

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3.3K reads

CURATED FROM

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bro_kzz

Unapologetic reader and proud communicator. Coffee everyday.

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When you’re in what seems like a negative situation, find what’s good.

...to counteract that ask yourself better questions.

Questions that will help you to feel better but also to learn so you can grow.

Questions like:

  • What’s one good thing about this situation?
  • What’s one thing I can do differentl...

Change the Story You Tell Yourself

Pay attention to the story you are telling yourself and ask if there’s another way to look at the situation. You might discover a slight shift in the way you think...

Decision making is value clarification

Decision making is value clarification

You’re going to have to ask yourself, “Of all these things I want, what’s really no1 for me? If you’re clear on your priorities, it will be that much easier for you to design the best outcome for your life.

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