... in the practical ways:
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Be conscious not to point blame at your partner by phrasing sentences that start with words such as “You make me... “ or “You didn’t…”
Instead, begin by saying, “I feel hurt ...
Once you voice what’s bothering you, be sure to hear how your partner responds. Give him or her a chance to speak and listen to what he or she says.
It may be that you’re misinterpreting the behavior, he or she wasn’t conscious of how you feel, or you’re doing or saying something to influence them.
A devoted husband or wife will want to support you when you need it most, but not if you take your anxiety out on them or take his or her love for granted.
A self-centered worldview will have you chasing boogeymen where they don’t exist.
Stop psycho-analyzing every word choice your partner makes and be more present in the moment so ...
Have you ever found thinking negative thoughts like, “I know they’ll get sick of me someday,” or, “How could they love me?”
These thoughts have little to do with reality but a lot to do with fear.
A little baggage is totally okay, but you need to lighten your load before jumping into any new relationship.
Let go of any left-over hurtful feelings that might be lingering and realize that your new relationship is a new opportunity to put all of that behind you.
Practice paraphrasing instead of responding with nods, a-ha's, and yeah's.
This type of communicating makes your partner feel like they are getting real attention and empathy.
Try to talk about the issue at hand and how it makes you feel.
“It makes me feel frustrated that you forgot what I wanted. Is there a way I can help you to remember next time?”
It is important to remind your partner you appreciate them.
This generates a warm and loving atmosphere as a backdrop to your relationship.
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