Learn more about psychology with this collection
How to find inspiration in everyday life
How to stay motivated
How to cultivate a positive mindset
2. Avoid generaliaztion
Sometimes, our impression of ourselves does not match others’ impression. This is called the spotlight effect — a tendency in which you misjudge and overestimate how much attention others pay to your behavior.
To combat the spotlight effect, consider your performance on aggregate versus zeroing in on a singular negative event.
Think of a bell curve: you’ll likely perform average or higher than average most days. Some days will be below average, and that’s normal.
Keep an eye on the bigger picture.
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When self-criticisim is too much
Perhaps you have thought that self-criticism is what keeps you sharp. Sensitive strivers (high-achievers who are also highly sensitive, demanding excellence from themselves at all times) often use this technique as a form of motivation, hoping that if they’re to...
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1. Name your inner-critic
Create psychological distance from self-criticism by personifying it. Choose a silly name, like “the little monster” or “gremlin”, or, why not, Darth Vader. Purchasing a small Darth Vader action figure for your desk reminds you t...
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3. Flip the “what if” narrative
Our minds are wired to make meaning and answer questions; the sensitive brain is making connections and anticipating eventualities. Studies have shown that sensitive people have more active mental circuitry and neurochemi...
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6. Reflect at the end of your day
Take a few moments at the end of your workday to reflect not only on your professional highlights (praise, recognition, positive reviews, etc.), but also to consider moments where you made yourself proud. Acting in integrity with your values is the true definition of success.
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Being too hard on yourself is a hard pattern to break
Being hard on yourself may be ineffective, but it is also a hard pattern to break. It requires consistent attention and practice. Here are a few strategies that can set you on the path to taking a more balanced, emotionally equanimous approach to your performance.
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4. Set a timer and a goal
Being hard on yourself can ruin your mood, focus, and productivity. Luckily, shame and humiliation – two emotions that are common with self-criticism — are shown to only last between 30 to 50 minutes.
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5. Expand your definition of success
As a sensitive striver, you likely have a tendency to define achievement in a hyper-specific way, that is, complete and total excellence at all times. You don’t need to lower your bar, but you do need to broaden your scope of what qualifies as a “win.”
Achieving the desire...
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CURATED FROM
CURATED BY
Full-time digital product designer & part-time traveler. Funny, bald, bearded dad. Foodie, rider, stasher.
As a sensitive striver who deals with the effects of self-criticism on a constant base, I found these techinques interesting to put in practice. Especially the naming one and the timer. It takes a lot of effort to be conscious when this is happening and try to use them, but it’s something I’ll definitely try next time I’m spiralling down into self-recrimination. 🤞🙏
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