If someone comes up to me and says, “Let’s see whose religion is right,” I first listen respectfully, then say, “Thank you for introducing me to aspects of your religion that I didn’t know much about. I appreciate that.” If I were to engage in an argument in order to win, the only result would be that someone would feel hurt. Even if I did win, what good would result? The other person would only feel defeated.
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The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
If we lose the argument, we lose; if we win the argument, we have made the other person feel inferior, hurt his pride, and made him resent us. In other words, we still lose.
Someone feeling hurt might use guilt trips when they don’t know any other way to deal with their emotional turmoil. It’s tough to listen if someone won’t admit there’s a problem, but get the discussion started by pointing out their behavior. Then give them space to expres...
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