Bite-sized knowledge
to upgrade
your career

Ideas from books, articles & podcasts.

You fail to set boundaries

Whether it’s constantly staying late to please your manager or always letting yourself be trauma-dumped on, these may seem like positive actions that prove your value as a colleague or friend but people-pleasing behaviour can actually end up contributing to self-sabotage.

“As humans, we want to be accepted and be part of the pack,” Knowles explains. “If you want a job promotion that your friend also wants, your need to be liked and accepted may sabotage you so that you don’t go for it and push her forward for it instead.”

STASHED IN:

@a.15

created an idea from a article:

𝟝 𝕤𝕚𝕘𝕟𝕤 𝕪𝕠𝕦’𝕣𝕖 𝕤𝕖𝕝𝕗-𝕤𝕒𝕓𝕠𝕥𝕒𝕘𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕟 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕚𝕥

stylist.co.uk

MORE IDEAS FROM THE SAME ARTICLE

Why do we self-sabotage?

According to Rochelle Knowles, founder of Mindful Eyes coaching, it all boils down to fear.

Self-sabotage, as it’s often termed, isn’t always obvious. It manifests in covert and unconscious ways that deliberately hinder our own success and wellbeing by undermining our personal goals and values.

It’s the idea that we say yes even when we want to say no and feel the need to agree wi...

You procrastinate extensively

We’re all guilty of putting off important tasks from time to time, but procrastination can also be a way of not taking responsibility for your actions and avoiding rejection.

In many instances, we self-sabotage because we desire acceptance. We don’t actually want to go out, but we do because our friend needs a wing-woman and she doesn’t want to go alone. We put ourselves forward for extra responsibilities at work because we know that our boss wants us to.

“Our c...

You regularly experience imposter syndrome

When an individual is self-sabotaging, their internal narrative is overwhelmingly one of “I can’t do this,” or “I don’t deserve that.” Believing you’re not good enough – for your partner, in your job or any other realm of your life – reinforces the feelings of worthlessness or incompetence that c...

How to overcome self-sabotage

Knowles believes that every self-sabotaging behaviour has a positive intention. “But it’s about taking a moment to think: ‘Is this the right action for me?’ ‘Is what I’m doing self-supporting?’” she explains.

You’re always expecting the worst

There’s a big difference between being realistic about your chances of something happening and constantly catastrophising that nothing is going to go your way.

Once you have a better understanding of what patterns of thinking cause those emotions, you can begin to challenge them with positive self-talk, affirmations and self-supporting behaviours.

“Remember that you’re the one in control, and you’re the one that’s got to be ultimately accountable,...