Commit to what you are expressing

Embrace the awkward moment fully. By doing this, you show true confidence.

The fear of looking ridiculous and being judged by others freezes your emotions and expressions, amplifying your discomfort in front of others.

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@lila_ls

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Communication

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... and gesticulate while you're speaking.

Hiding your hands and palms usually signals to your audience that you are hiding something, thus making you look less trustworthy.

Using your hands also makes your stories and arguments seem more intriguing.

  • Show confident body language, especially if the story is self-deprecating.
  • Use high impact words, packed with emotions, to draw people's attention.
  • Embody the characters of the story (act like they would and match their voice and accent).
  1. Adjust your body language.
  2. Learn to handle friendly teasing.
  3. Tell your own embarrassing stories.
  4. Let go of managing people's opinions of you.
  • Take up more space: this signals that you are not afraid to take control on a physical level and it shows increased confidence.
  • Laugh with the group: if you laugh with it, it goes away in most cases.
  • Double down on the joke: amplifying the joke puts you in control of the situation, shows your human side and spreads the laughter.

By simply adjusting your body language, you can improve both how you see yourself (thus, improving your self-confidence) and how other people see you.

Give everyone in your audience at least 3 seconds of continuous eye contact before moving to the next person. This is usually enough to make people feel included in a conversation.

The '3-second rule' is a great and simple way to engage your audience and convey a sense of ease with it, even when you're feeling nervous.

99% of all awkward situations are made worse because you are trying to be perceived in a certain way by the others.

Stop managing people's opinions of you. Your confidence should not be based on those outside perceptions, but in recognizing that you are not perfect and liking yourself anyway.

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... without making enemies:
  • Make sure you communicate you are not there to fight (using your tone of voice, for example).
  • Avoid making statements; instead, ask questions.
  • Defend yourself with confidence, but without coming across as antagonistic.

How To Win An Argument Without Making Enemies

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Adjusting your body language

When you're nervous, your body tends to tighten up, leading to short stiff movements or fidgeting. By contrast, bigger hand movements while speaking convey confidence (they make you look and even feel more confident.)

An easy way to start exercising hand movements is using the voice rule: simply move your hand in rhythm with your voice.

How To Turn Insecurity Into Confidence

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Surrender

You have to release your feeling of control and your expectations on yourself. 

All you have to do is to let go, slow down without taking actions.

what to do when you feel like doing nothing (unmotivated, burnt out, unproductive)

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