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Self-sabotage is a misnomer
The actions that destroy our plans and relationships are a suboptimal effort at self-protection.
What we call “self-sabotage” often happens because if you achieve a goal, things will need to change. All change involves some degree of loss. Any change to our status quo can trigger a threat response as change requires risk.
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32 reads
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All behavior is functional
Not all behaviour is acceptable, but all behaviour is functional. Behaviour modification without understanding behaviour will almost always make us inert.
You don't need to make giant behavioural transformations to get unstuck-getting unstuck requires tiny micro-shi...
13
30 reads
Mental health is a physical process
"Mental" health has very little to do with our minds. A nervous system stuck in a fight, flight, or freeze response will show the exact symptoms as clinical depression or pathological anxiety.
The nervous system is not an illness or disorder. It is doing exactly what it is designed ...
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25 reads
You can't think your way out of stuck
Thoughts can help shape behaviour and therefore reality. But motivation is mostly a physiological issue, not a mind issue.
The "fight, flight, or freeze" response is activated by a physiological mechanism inside the nervous system. When you are stuck in fight or flight, such as panic or rac...
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35 reads
We need anxiety
Anxiety is a roadmap that points us to a real or imagined threat, pain from the past or something in the present that needs our attention.
While anxiety can be debilitating and must be managed, we need it. If we disable or mute our anxiety indicators, we wo...
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64 reads
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Self-Sabotage Traps
Some people appear immune to workplace burnout, due to their having a different response towards stress. Many of these burnout ‘survivors’ are actually getting into various self-sabotage traps. These traps can be handled by two important emotional intelligence skills:
- Self-awaren...
We don't like change
- Some people say they want to change, but they don't really mean it.
- Even when altering our behavior represents all reward and no risk and clinging to the status quo can costs us our careers and relationships, we still resist change.
- Smoking should be a relati...
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