Learn more about psychology with this collection
Understanding the importance of decision-making
Identifying biases that affect decision-making
Analyzing the potential outcomes of a decision
The Memory Remains
But just because we’ve found the stinky cheese and cleaned it doesn’t mean we’re free of it. That smell was with us a long time, and the feelings it caused will always be with us. The goal of therapy is to become aware of these feelings and learn to accept them but not let them dictate our lives. We can’t get rid of shame, but we can understand it, accept it, and not let it define us. We can remind ourselves that even though the cheese is gone, the smell stays with us.
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Making Cosmetic Changes To Clean The Inner Shame
Times when we feel like we stink, and that other people can smell this, and that other people will know we stink and think less of us, that people in our lives that we love will think we are bad people because we smell. We explore the shameful feelings, and through that process we are able to fin...
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Only We Know Our Cheesy Smell Of Shame
People around us, friends, family, and loved ones don’t smell the cheese anymore. In fact, we might do such a good job searching for the cheese, examining the cheese, talking about the cheese, we might emotionally clean the cheese smell out completely. But the truth is, the smell will always ling...
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Shame Vs Guilt
Shame is different than guilt. Guilt is the feeling we get when we do something bad, something we know is wrong. It’s something we can fix by doing better next time. We can give ourselves another chance. Shame is much more diabolical. ...
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Early Shame Experiences
Shame starts early.
Each experience of shame is like hiding little pieces of stinky cheese deep in the consciousness of our true selves. The cheese of shame is always there, slowly rotting, and smelling worse and worse over time. The irony is, even though this shame smell i...
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How Shame Stays With Us
- Shame can be so ingrained in our lives from an early age that we don’t appreciate how powerfully it affects us in the present.
- The “cheese” of shame is always there, slowly rotting, and smelling worse and worse over time.
- Even after shame is addressed, the memory of its “smel...
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The Root Cause Of Mental Issues: Shame
Shame lies at the heart of many of the issues that bring people to therapy. The dictionary definition of shame is “a painful feeling of humiliation or distress cau...
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6. Forgiving Past Mistakes
We all have chapters in our lives we’re not proud of. Mistakes we’ve made, things we’ve said, decisions we regret. But one of the most freeing and transformative behaviors is learning to forgive ourselves for these past mistakes.
It’s human nature to err. But holding onto guilt and regret o...
How to Let Go of Regret
Let go of the ideals, and embrace reality.
- The choice we made in the past is done, and we can’t change it. Some choices will be great, some won’t be perfect.
- Making a bad choice isn’t in conflict with our realistic, not fixed self-identity. It’s a part of it...
Why accepting emotions is helpful
What is the point of trying to accept your emotions, and wouldn’t it be easier to simply get rid of them?
Well, no, it isn’t easy to get rid of emotions. In fact, most people with BPD have tried to get rid of their emotions with little success. What they have learned, and what rese...
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