Wanting well, like thinking clearly, is not an ability we’re born with. It’s a freedom we have to earn. Due to one powerful yet little-known feature of human desire, that freedom is hard-won.
People don’t choose objects of desire the way they choose to wear a coat in the winter. Instead of internal biological signals, we have a different kind of external signal that motivates these choices: models. Models are people or things that show us what is worth wanting. It is models—not our “objective” analysis or central nervous system—that shape our desires.
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The real reason we want what we want.
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The discipline of desire tells us what is, and is not, proper to want. This, in turn, derives from the fact that some things are in our power and others are not.
Two of the four Stoic virtues are pertinent to regulating desire:
The discipline of desire tells us what is, and is not, proper to want. This, in turn, derives from the fact that some things are in our power and others are not.
Two of the four Stoic virtues are pertinent to regulating desire:
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