Constructively confront someone
Our own fears keep us from confronting others. We fear that we'll lose something, hurt someone we care about, or that it will accomplish nothing.
- Recognize that fear in yourself and identify the real issues that led to the conflict.
- When you are able to discuss the issue, instead of firing accusations, describe your behavior using "I" statements: "I feel hurt that .............................."
MORE IDEAS FROM THE ARTICLE
Emotional intelligence (or E.I.) is your ability to be aware of your own emotions, to recognize emotions in others and use that information to guide your behavior.
When you develop your own E.I., you can understand and improve your social interactions.
- Self-awareness: Do you get anxious in loud environments? Self-awareness is knowing these things about yourself.
- Self-regulation deals with your ability to manage your own emotions.
- Motivation: You know how to motivate yourself and create or continue projects because you choose to.
- Empathy: It means recognizing the emotions of others.
- Socialization: It is your ability to navigate social situations, including conveying your ideas to co-workers or dealing with a conflict in a relationship.
Group conversations are loud and can seem chaotic. Don't get frustrated. Go with the flow of the conversation and look for opportunities to jump in.
When you say something, speak loudly and with confidence. Keep your stories short or frame a complaint as a story.
The most important aspect of developing a new friendship is to show up.
- Decide that you're going to make friends and then put yourself in situations where you can find friends. Take a class or join a club.
- Make a point to follow up if you found someone you want as a friend.
Most of us are willing to talk to a stranger. Few are eager to make the first move.
If the person seems open to a conversation and is not busy, start by saying hello or opening with a compliment. After that, you can keep the conversation flowing by offering an observation or insight and follow it up with a question.
RELATED IDEAS
- Spend less money than you earn
- Always plan for the future: you should always look forward beyond the current month
- Make your money make more money: invest, start a business or invest in your education.
It's your inner drive to accomplish something.
In order to start making use of that motivation, you first need to identify your own values. Use a journal to find times when you’ve felt fulfilled. Create a list of things you value. Most of all, accept the uncertainty in life and just build something.
American psychologist Edward Thorndike defines social intelligence as ‘the ability to understand people and act wisely in human relations.’ These skills can be acquired with practice.
Some people can sense how other people feel and what to say in social gatherings. These confident, caring people seem to have people skills, but in fact, what they have is social intelligence.