Effortless Stoicism

Effortless Stoicism comes to you when you no longer feel the need to control your emotions, when they no longer seem significant.

If we stop reacting to our emotions, then gradually we can develop the perspective to observe the causes of these emotions that we witness inside us. Shedding all illusions, we come to know that all misery and happiness are temporary, and therefore all reactions are unfounded and unjustified.

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6 Healthy Relationship Habits Most People Think Are Toxic

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But the post also helped a lot of people. Since writing it, it's generated a staggering amount of thank you emails, and no less than 20 people notified me that it inspired them to end their relationships (or even in a few cases, their marriages).

Key Ideas

Unresolved conflicts

The idea that couples must communicate and resolve all of their problems is a myth. The truth is, trying to resolve a conflict can sometimes create more problems than it fixes.

Being honest

The last person you should ever have to censor yourself with is the person you love.

It’s important to make something more important in your relationship than merely making each other feel good all of the time. The feel-good stuff happens when you get the other stuff right.

Being willing to end it

Romantic sacrifice is idealized in our culture.

Sometimes the only thing that can make a relationship successful is ending it at the appropriate time, before it becomes too damaging. And the willingness to do that allows us to establish the necessary boundaries to help ourselves and our partner grow together.

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