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How To Stop Caring About What People Think & Do - Darius Foroux
It's Ok To Disappoint Others
It's ok to disappoint others, instead of falling in the trap of doing obligatory and unnecessary work, as many kind and thoughtful people end up doing. It is ok to say NO to others, as the most important task you have is to live up to your core values and your mission.
If people are disappointed with you, it is a revelation that they are selfish, and are not concerned with the wellbeing of others.
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How to set the right example
- Expect from others what you expect from yourself. Never ask for something you're not doing.
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Being a people-pleaser
If you ever say "yes", when you want to say "no", or nod in agreement when you don't agree, you've probably experienced people pleasing.
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Develop Awareness Of Your Behavior
People are often unaware of their people-pleasing behavior. The habit can become so ingrained that it's automatic.
It takes full commitment to stay aware with an intention to change. Write a list of all the things you would normally do in an effort to please. Take note of each time you do them and figure out how you will change it next time.
Drop the Label
When you label yourself with "I am...," it has the potential to become your identity. "I am a people pleaser. I am not liked."
Never describe yourself as a people pleaser. Instead, describe your behavior as you make a decision to change it.