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How to Deal with Negative People

Lao Tzu

“What is a good man but a bad man’s teacher? What is a bad man but a good man’s job? If you don’t understand this, you will get lost, however intelligent you are. It is the great secret.” 

Lao Tzu

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

How to Deal with Negative People

How to Deal with Negative People

https://www.purposefairy.com/849/how-to-deal-with-negative-people/

purposefairy.com

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Key Ideas

Lao Tzu

Lao Tzu

“What is a good man but a bad man’s teacher? What is a bad man but a good man’s job? If you don’t understand this, you will get lost, however intelligent you are. It is the great secret.” 

Take every experience as a lesson

Whenever you find yourself in an unpleasant or difficult situation, try to see what you can take away from this very experience.

Try to perceive your experiences as lessons and to understand them, so you can feel at ease with the others and with yourself. 

Read between the lines

Whenever you deal with difficult people, take into account two aspects: you should not let their actions affect your life in a negative way and you may want to try first to understand them, rather than just to judge them. 

After all, they might be fighting a battle you know nothing about.

Don't take it personally

When dealing with difficult individuals, remember that their unpleasant actions are proof of their own lifestyle and unhappiness and in no way are these related to you. 

Therefore, stand your ground in the most polite way possible and do not let their behavior have a negative impact on your life.

Learn how to handle negativity

Throughout your life, you should expect to run into negative people over and over again. However, do not forget that you are the only one responsible for the way you react to their actions. 

Therefore, adopting a positive attitude will most likely save you the frustration and not only, which otherwise might result from an interaction with them.

Miguel Ruiz

Miguel Ruiz

“Don’t take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.” 

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Dealing with negative people

It's primarily about learning to differentiate between the opinions you should consider and the ones you should ignore.

You'll always run into negative people, so the best thing you ca...

Find the critic's baseline

... before you assume they are being negative.

By spending a little time figuring out how they usually are (if they are optimistic, pessimistic or pragmatic), you will be able to differentiate between the times that they are just being themselves versus the times that they may be recognizing something truly noteworthy.

Follow the "Three's company" rule

Just because a person's a pessimist doesn't mean they're not right. And an easy way to figure if their advice is worth following is to simply ask around and figure out if a consensus exists that falls in line with the person's view.

If it's a unanimous opinion, then perhaps that person isn't as pessimistic as you think, and you should consider their advice.

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4 different types of difficult people

  • The Downers (the Negative Nancys): almost impossible to please, they always have something bad to say. They complain, critique and judge. 
  • The Know It Alls: The...

Disengaging difficult personalities

Don't try changing people, try understanding them.

When you try to change someone they tend to resent you, dig in their heels, and get worse. The way to disengage a difficult person is to try understanding where they are coming from.

Finding The Value Language

When trying to understand difficult people, search for their value language.

A value language is what someone values most. It is what drives their decisions. For some people it is money; for others, it is power or knowledge.

How to know if you're depressed

Depression symptoms can vary, but it always results in living in a negative state. 

Common signs include:
  • Feeling hopeless or a lack of energy and interest in things that ...

Ways to deal with depression

Understand the common triggers. Once you understand which one is behind your depression, you can better learn how to cope with depression.

Feelings of loss, “less than” and “never going to happen” are the major reasons that most people dip into depression. Loss can result from a loved one dying or losing a job; feelings of “less than” can be triggered by comparing yourself to others you view as having more than you and “never” occurs when you start believing that your goals and dreams are completely out of reach. 

Address your limiting beliefs

Many of those trying to find ways to deal with depression have formed limiting beliefs that negatively affect how they think.

If you come from a family who has never had a member attend college, you might believe that you are not smart enough to achieve your goals. Another common limiting belief is that they are supposed to be sad because depression or anxiety runs in their family. 

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