Desiring a growth-driven mindset

Narcissists believe they're unique and superior, while humble leaders know they're flawed. 

The humble narcissist has grand ambitions but doesn't feel entitled to them. He is also willing to acknowledge his weaknesses and learn from his mistakes.

We're all drawn to someone who shows confidence - that is the reason that narcissists are more likely to be promoted or get elected to political office. But on its own, narcissism is dangerous. It tends to promote overconfidence and it dismisses the criticism.

Adding humility to narcissism prevents capriciousness and complacency. It helps you remember that you’re human.

1. Our culture promotes and rewards overconfidence and arrogance; 
2. At the same time, when we are wrong — out of ignorance or error — and realize it, our culture doesn’t make it easy to admit it. Humbling moments too easily can turn into moments of humiliation.

Even if we might tell ourselves our experience of the world is the truth. Our interpretations of reality are often arbitrary, but we're still stubborn about them. Light enters our eyes, sound waves enter our ears, chemicals waft into our noses, and it’s up to our brains to make a guess about what it all is. 

These are people who don't reflect on thinking nor consider the consequences of not thinking. Their prejudices and misconceptions lead them.

They do not consistently apply standards like accuracy, relevance, precision, and logic.

People at this intellectual stage are aware of the importance of thinking and know that the lack of thinking can result in major issues.

• They acknowledge that their own mental processes might have many flaws but are unable to identify all the weaknesses.
• They may spot some instances of their own self-deception.
• They may have a sense that proper thinking involves navigating assumptions, inferences, and points of view, but only on a basic level.

True confidence in yourself doesn’t come only from the knowledge you already possess, but a willingness to learn more.

There’s no shame in admitting you don't know something; you’re showing just how confident you can be. Ask questions, be curious about the world around you.

A truly confident man won’t get aggressive or arrogant, because those traits suggest someone is losing control.  He knows keeping cool and talking in a calm, measured way is the quickest way to get respect.

• A high AC: you have obtained your information through focused and objective research and would be open to changing your position if presented with sufficient evidence.
• A low AC: you reactively believe whatever comes across your news feed and hold onto your beliefs in a dogmatic and tribal manner.

True humility allows you to plot Point A and accept that risk and failure are part of moving to Point B.

• On the other hand, pride allows us to say we are beginners, but not to accept the process of learning that involves risk and failure. 
• Then pride tries to protect our ego by convincing us that the price of possible failure is too great to achieve something new.

Humility brings growth. Pride is good at trying to convince us that we are not prideful.

Approach learning and growth with real humility. Accept that pride affects us all and will try to limit you. Failure is part of the process. Set aside your ego and simply move past the failure. Make adjustments, and continue the process anew.

• Confidence is an amplifier of quality and success. 
• Confidence is essential to influence and leadership.
• Confidence isn’t just about style. It’s also about substance.
• Confidence protects us. It's one of the greatest weapons we can develop.

Confidence is expressed most profoundly through our bodies. No matter how well we speak, the way we feel about ourselves will always manifest in our posture, our hand movements and our facial features. 

So commit to strong, positive body language and make a conscious effort to form habits that make your nonverbal communication automatic.

Outside forces don’t make us feel things, our perceptions of them do. It’s easy to think otherwise, but doing so harms us and undermines our self-discipline.

The next time you run into an obstacle and feel resistance, don’t look at what’s around you. Instead, look within.

Whatever you do, there are individuals that you can learn from. If you can’t talk to them, you can study their story, works, techniques, successes, and failures, and discover patterns of success you can apply to your life.

Be careful not to turn it into an exercise of comparison and expect your progress to be the same as theirs. Their teachings and principles are supposed to help you grow, learn, and create.