Fear of failure is very common among leaders - even top leaders who appear to be super-successful. When unchecked, that fear holds us back from aiming high, from being all-in, from really going for it. The consequences can be enormous; slowing business innovation, hampering organizational growth, and compromising personal development. What big things are you afraid of failing at?Is fear of failure a theme in your life?How do you treat yourself when you're afraid of failing?5 Ways to Deal with Your Fear of Failing (Without Getting Defensive!)

Practice how you respond. Notice what you feel and do when you: a) succumb to the fear, b) push through the fear, and c) release the fear. Getting familiar with and practicing your different responses will make it easier for you to consciously choose.

Give yourself a break. Stop telling yourself stories that equate fear of failure with diminished self-worth. Remind yourself that all you can do is your best, regardless of whether you fail or succeed.

All leaders, no matter how experienced, fear failing at times. What matters is how you respond to the fear. Use the tips above to up your game and not be overcome by your fears. It's all part of showing up authentically, being vulnerable, and putting the power of love to work.

Closing 

Find the moment before you react. Whenever you notice fear of failure, take a deep breath. This is the space in which you can choose your response, including what story you tell yourself.

Full catastrophe thinking. With that big thing you're afraid of failing at in mind, imagine what might actually happen if you do fail. Play it out, make it dramatic, see it all the way through. Now ask yourself how likely those outcomes are, and how you would be as a result.

Tell yourself the truth. Put into words the biggest thing you're afraid of failing at. Say the words out loud when no one else is around. Repeat a few times. Notice your reaction to hearing your own acknowledgment of what is true. You just might feel a little sense of relief.

Worry about not measuring up can hold you back as a leader."What if I fail?" This was the heavy concern a CEO softly shared when I was coaching him about moving his organization in a new direction. It was a breakthrough moment for him to acknowledge and voice his deep and long-held fear of failing at big transformation. He was courageous enough to admit to his fear, and not hide beyond arrogance, machismo, or denial. Now we could work with it so he could let it go.

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