Having ‘breakout’ success is not an intentional goal.
Giving your life meaning and purpose, while being creatively engaged with the problems of the now, is an emotionally healthy definition of success.
Most scientific breakthroughs have been from people who questioned the status quo and assumptions which were the norm. The ‘outsiders’ with no fixed plan asked the right questions and did something that seemed small and unexpected, in the present moment.
MORE IDEAS FROM Steps to Becoming Insanely Successful...or Whatever | Mark Manson
Our definitions of success are made up and largely motivated by our emotional dysfunctions. Most people work towards the formula of success, striving for money, prestige and power, running towards a goal that keeps getting farther away. They get super exhausted and may experience a breakdown when they realize that all this does not really mean anything.
When we realize that our emotional dysfunctions and pressures of society were our main motivators towards whatever we had been pursuing, we suddenly see the futility of it all and experience an existential crisisn(or a mid-life crisis) sometime in our 40s or 50s.
The Narrative Fallacy makes us to see events as stories, with logical chains of cause and effect. When it comes to success, do not fall for the ‘narrative’ fallacy’ and think that great people became successful due to what happened to them, and if we emulate that, we will achieve the same result.
We need to do something extraordinary and exceptional to achieve great success, and that makes any successful person an exception, someone who did what few others were willing to do. Instead of googling for success, find what you want to do to change the world!
Being a good person, taking care of your loved ones, being trustworthy, positive and honest, don’t require much and makes even a simple existence an enjoyable one.
Life, as imperfect and unfair it may seem, is pretty good. Life has plenty of beautiful moments if our definition of success isn’t about accumulation of wealth or a drive towards more power, but to live a healthy, happy and fulfilling life.
The silver bullet is that you need to put in the work everyday for years.
It’s not some Facebook ads hack. Or some magical $2000 conference.
But no matter how many times people tell you that, you’re still going to dig around for the secret answer.
When you think you have to sacrifice something in your life in order to be successful you will build frustration and resentment towards yourself. And so that lofty goal that should have made you happy ends up making you miserable. 💭
Toxic self-esteem is easy to notice. One can see a disconnect between how the person sees himself, and how the world sees him.
It is your coworker who’s incompetent in their job but takes credit for other people’s work.
Those with a toxic self-esteem feel good about themselves but are very fragile. In order to keep up their self-esteem, they need to constantly feed it.
❤️ Brainstash Inc.