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Shut Up and Be Grateful

Gratitude is the skill of happiness

It requires practice and effort and habit. But it’s a skill anyone can learn and anyone can do. 

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Shut Up and Be Grateful

Shut Up and Be Grateful

https://markmanson.net/shut-up-and-be-grateful

markmanson.net

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Key Ideas

The human mind naturally overemphasizes the negative

Psychologists have found that the loss of something is two to four times more painful than the joy of gaining the same thing.

Consciously practicing gratitude makes one happier

It makes one appreciate what one has and helps one to remain in the present moment. Practicing gratitude increases accountability which directly leads to higher self-esteem and happiness.

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Reinforcing People’s Helpfulness
Reinforcing People’s Helpfulness
  • Strong sense of in-group: the belief that the person in need is on your team makes us more helpful to them as we care about what happens to the in-group. 
  • Opportunity to...
2 types of gratitude expression
  • Other-praising: involves acknowledging and validating the character or abilities of the giver;
  • Self-benefit: which describes how the receiver is better off for having been given help. 

The former makes people feel better with themselves and that you are more grateful when compared to the latter.

Reminding People That They Owe You One

If you have to remind someone that they owe you one, chances are they don’t feel as if they do. Reminding them that they owe you a favor both makes the other person feel as if you’re trying to control them and it makes the other person feel as if you’re keeping a scorecard, and that’s fundamentally bad for relationships.

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The Ritual Of Gratitude
The Ritual Of Gratitude

Setting aside time daily for practising gratitude, for the littlest of things life has bestowed us with, can have a profound effect on our minds and our lives. Things to be grateful for:

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The Painful Days

During the most painful days, or when one is upset, is procrastinating, sick or injured, or having relationship issues, it is easy to forget the good parts, and therefore extremely important to 'balance the scales' by remembering what you are grateful for.

Be thankful for having the energy and power to heal, for the time provided to you on this planet, and for the way challenges help you grow wiser.

One chooses to be grateful, focusing on the little miracles of life, no matter what the circumstances.

2 kinds of people
  • Those who believe they can make things happen. They are convinced that the outcome of their lives and careers is more or less in their own hands
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When hard times strike

Those that feel they are in control over their lives also feel stress and anxiety, but they use this anxiety differently: their anxiety fuels passion instead of pity, drive in lieu of despair, and tenacity over trepidation.

Expect and prepare for change

Set aside some time regularly to create a list of important changes that you think could possibly happen. The purpose of this task is to open your mind to change and sharpen your ability to spot and respond to changes. 

Even if the events on your lists never happen, the practice of anticipating and preparing for change will give you a greater sense of command over your future.

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