The art of the soft "no" - Deepstash
The Psychology of Money

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The Psychology of Money

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The art of the soft "no"

There is a difference between a hard “No, thank you” and a softer “Thanks so much for asking, but I’m not able to this week.” Another example: “Thank you so much for asking me to do this project. It sounds fascinating, but I don’t have the bandwidth for it at this time.

Don’t feel obligated to give too much of an explanation or being over-apologetic. It may confuse the other person. Stick with an elegant and soft no.

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MORE IDEAS ON THIS

Know when you can safely say "no"

  • Over one week, observe how you spend your time and energy. Keep note of how many times you say yes, no, or maybe to a request. Notice and record how each request made you feel.
  • Identify the times you say no and everything still works out fine. This...

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Understand your bandwidth

Try to document your energy level and your calendar. How much did you have to do? Did saying yes to too many things mean your days were too busy?

Next time someone makes a request, assess your time and energy before taking on more tasks.

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Discerning between desire and obligation when saying "yes"

Writing down your data helps you distinguish between when you feel excited to say yes to something and when it feels like an obligation.

Be intentional about saying yes. When you feel an urge to please, pause. It will buy ...

504

1.68K reads

The people pleaser

The people pleaser

There's a high price for continually saying yes to the thing you just don't want to do.

When your top priority is to be liked all the time, you suppress and repress who you are. The good news is that it is a habit you can change.

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3.22K reads

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vanessaw

I like movies, reading books and tea. I also listen to a lot of podcasts.

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“No, Thank You”

If and when you don’t want to do something, reply with a simple, “No, thank you.

Sometimes, trying to offer an explanation of your refusal will open the door for arguments and maybe even for a future similar invitation. By offering this answer, you’ve made it clear that you’re not i...

The Altar Of No Difference - Day 112

"We are like pellets of incense falling on the altar. Some collapse sooner, others later, but it makes no difference."-Marcus Aurelius

  • Measuring ourselves against others makes acceptance difficult, because we want what they have, not what we happen to have. But that makes no ...

No One Is Immune To The Anchor Effect

Anchoring is an extremely strong bias, and even if we are aware of it, it still works. We can follow certain rules to avoid this highly prevalent and effective cognitive bias as much as possible:

  1. Be aware of the anchor effect and recognize that our need for a bargain and even our moo...

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