Love is focused on the other person - Deepstash

Bite‑sized knowledge

to upgrade

your career

Ideas from books, articles & podcasts.

Love is focused on the other person

  • This type of love is displayed when we come across the itinerant drunk - weather-beaten and ranting - and do not turn away but consider them as a version of ourselves, falling prey to the same passions and getting upset by similar losses and worthy of their own share of compassion.
  • We also show love to the well-dressed person shouting grandly at an airport, filled with self-righteousness, and do not dismiss them as insane or entitled, but as vulnerable beneath the bluster.
  • We show love when we see a small child throwing themselves on the floor, and do not focus on how piercing their screams are, but that their pain is in its general form ours too.
  • It is love too when our partner is sometimes plainly irrational, unfair, and maddening, and we do not direct back a full dose of righteous anger but hold back and wonder how this formerly sane adult should have fallen apart in this manner. It is to hold open the idea that they might not have slept very well, are perhaps panicked by the future, and don't understand how to master it.

3

STASHED IN:

92

MORE IDEAS FROM THE SAME ARTICLE

Love is often seen as the exciting feeling we get in the presence of someone with great intelligence of beauty that we hope will reciprocate our interest and whom we badly want to touch and one day share our lives with.

But there is another definition of love that is not so much focuse...

Nothing is more important than the love that rescues nations from intolerance, which slows wars, calms furies, and allows civilisation to continue. True love is not giving someone what their due is, but what they need in order to survive.

True love acknowledges how much we...

It is no particular accomplishment to love someone who is on their best behavior.

What is needed for our attention is the love of what is crooked, damaged, and self-disgusted. Here love is the effort required to imagine oneself into the life of another person who has not m...

Discover and save more ideas by creating a

FREE

Deepstash account.

Develop a

reading habit

, save

time

and create an amazing

knowledge library

.

GET THE APP:

MORE LIKE THIS

The choice of who we love

We look for people to love that recreate the feelings of love we knew from childhood. But the love we absorbed in childhood was intermingled with painful aspects: a feeling of not measuring up; a love for a fragile parent.

This predisposes us to pick partners with whom we ...

8

STASHED IN:

57

The Perfect Partner

We expect our partner to be perfect in every way. As we spend our life with our partner, we seem to mistakenly believe that the other person will have everything in common with us and will think the same thought that is occurring in our head, at the same time.

7

STASHED IN:

973

Love is vital in recovering from serious mental illness

Love is critical to help us keep faith with life and rescue us from severe mental illness.

In fact, anyone who has ever suffered from mental illness and recovers will do so because of love, whether from a friend, a partner, a child, or a parent.

24

STASHED IN:

285