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If you’re making an effort to be more social, there are going to be awkward moments.
If you only focus on avoiding awkwardness, then you’ll quickly give up on trying to socialize at all. And this is the opposite of what you want. So instead, I suggest you embrace the awkwardness . Instead of viewing awkward moments as a “failure,” see them as a sign that you’re pushing the limits of your comfort zone.
As with any other skill, you can only improve your social skills with deliberate practice . And in the course of practicing, you’re bound to have a few awkward moments. Even if you’re the most extroverted, outgoing person on the planet, you can’t escape awkwardness — it’s just a part of being human.
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If you’re an introvert , you may find it difficult to strike up conversations with random people in a coffee shop, bar, or line at the grocery store. This is because these situations are too open-ended, too lacking in stru...
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The key, however, is to ask open-ended questions . That is, ask questions that don’t have a simple “yes or no” answer.
It’s the difference between Do you like living here? and What do you think about living here? Or the difference between Where did you...
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These days, there are apps to deliver everything from groceries to toothpaste to tacos. Combine this with services that let you stream more media than you could ever consume in a lifetime, and it’s easy to spend most of your time inside, at home.
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Next time you’re having a conversation, see if you catch yourself thinking about what you’re going to say next rather than focusing on what the other person is saying. You may be surprised how often it happens.
Generally, being aware of this tendency is enough to improve it. But if you’re s...
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the more you do it the more it become better.
you can’t build your confidence if you aren’t getting out there and trying.
You can start small, and you can still embrace the alone time you need as an introvert (in fact, you neglect it at your peril).
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Wearing headphones says, “Please don’t talk to me, I don’t want to be bothered.” This is great when you don’t want your coworkers to interrupt you, but it’s terrible when you want to connect with people.
Putting away the headphones (or taking out the AirPods) opens you up to more social int...
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Being funny is a great way to make friends. But not everyone is funny. At least, not everyone is funny all the time. Not everyone has that personality. And that’s okay. You don’t have to be funny to have conversations and build great relationships. There’s room (and need) for serious people in th...
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When you’re trying to be more social, you should use “open” body language. Open body language signals to others that you’re interested in interacting with them.
So what does this look like in practice? Here are the key components:
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If you want to connect with people, however, you need to put away your phone. It will seem awkward at first, maybe even painful. But if you want to have a conversation, you need to first signal that you’re open to talking.
Putting away your phone sends a signal that you want to talk, and it...
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But how do you listen? Effective listening is about more than just passively receiving information. Instead, you need to show the other person that you’re listening.
The following body language shows that you’re listening:
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You’re very eager to socialize and every interaction with you becomes a long drawn out conversation - especially if there's an unpleasant task dawning that you'd like to put off.
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It’s hard to feel peaceful if you punish yourself for making mistakes. You may even end up avoiding risks and new experiences to escape the pain of your own self-judgment. But trying new things not only opens up avenues for you, but also brings a sense of fulfillment in life.
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