How to Keep Resentment From Controlling Us

How to Keep Resentment From Controlling Us

For us to be able to keep resentment from controlling us, we must be open to the idea of emotional forgiveness into our lives. When we welcome this idea, it helps us to get rid of any negative emotions so that we may create a new psychological reality.

It also aids us in having more flexible thoughts, we are then available to see things from a new perspective may they be in the form or people, relationships, or projects, moreover, we can then manage our anger properly.

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A person who has experienced trauma is prone to feelings of resentment. This is not to say that they don't have the right to be angry, they do, but they don't process this anger and let go.

Resentful people hold on to the fiery experiences because they want to be able to throw the pain back to those who've hurt them. However, they would also hurt themselves in the process.

Resentful people tend to remain stuck in a state of anguish up to the point where it will continuously interfere with their daily life. Their mood changes, they are distrustful of other people and they also tend to mistreat others just because they feel entitled to do so.

Those who hold resentment in their hearts tend to keep repeating the event over and over again in their heads. The pain that they feel then turns into anger to hatred to wanting to get revenge.

Characteristics and Psychological Profile of Resentful People
  1. They are unable to forgive.
  2. They have a black and white mindset (dichotomous thinking). They are living with a distorted cognitive reality where they don't realize that they do this.
  3. They have an immense amount of pride. They are always on the defensive and tend to take everything personally.
  4. They are unable to tend to their own emotional and psychological needs.

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  • Forgiveness is choosing to accept what happened as it happened rather than what could or should have happened. 
  • Forgiveness can mean that you let go. 
  • Forgiveness can mean you step into your present rather than anchoring in the past.



Dealing with your anger

Anger leads us to poor decisions, regrettable behavior, or hurt feelings. However, some anger leads to more significant consequences, like strained relationships or legal trouble.

The key to dealing with your anger more effectively is to understand how it works.

Choosing to deal with negative emotions

Ignoring feelings (like "stuffing your anger") is not the healthiest way to deal with them. generally speaking, that does not make them go away but can cause them to come out in different ways. That’s because your emotions act as signals to you that what you are doing in your life is or isn’t working.

Feeling angry or frustrated can be a signal that something needs to change. If you don’t change the situations or thought patterns that are causing these uncomfortable emotions, you will continue to be triggered by them.

Also, while you are not dealing with the emotions you are feeling, they can cause problems with your physical and emotional health.

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