On the other hand, self love is essentially about taking responsibility for one’s mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. Those who practice self love have good self esteem, because they can both appreciate their accomplishments in a realistic manner while also recognizing where they are weak or need to improve. Self love is also vital for entering into and maintaining healthy relationships. It may be overly repeated but it's true: you can’t truly love someone else until you’ve learned to love yourself.
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Self love is a funny concept, isn’t it? We are always taught that you should not be too prideful, arrogant, or boastful. Perhaps this is why self love can be such a tricky concept to grasp and then put into practice. It is important to know that self love and narcissism are two very different things and should not be confused for one another. Here are some of the main differences between these two concepts so that you can fully understand self love and learn why it is not about vanity or selfishness!
Essentially, a narcissist may seem like she has self love in spades, but the truth of the matter is that her self love is not based in reality. A narcissist is someone who is overly confident and who turns a blind eye to her weaknesses and imperfections, while overblowing her positive qualities. A narcissist's self love is extremely shallow as it is dependent on other people to fuel it. Narcissists feed off of the adoration and praise of others; without it, they have nothing. This obsession with self hinders the narcissist from being able to fully love others.
First of all, let’s start off with some definitions, shall we?
Narcissism: excessive or erotic interest in oneself and one's physical appearance.
Self-Love: regard for one's own well-being and happiness.
In spite of the exhibitionism, arrogance, vanity and a massive superiority complex, narcissists seem attractive, and alluring to a large section of people.
This surprising outcome may be due to people confusing narcissism with positive self-worth and high self-esteem.
They have inflated views of themselves (they think they are better than they actually are).
They make fantastic first impressions. But the stuff that works for narcissists so well in the short term proves lethal in the long term.
In job interviews, narcissists get results, but after three weeks people regard narcissists as untrustworthy. They make awesome first dates, but relationship satisfaction with them shows a big decline after 4 months.
A pathological narcissist loves to talk about himself, often in exaggerated and grandiose terms.
Common conversational topics for narcissists include accomplishments and achievements, exciting and envy-worthy activities, excessive focus on personal issues and concerns, excessive focus on looks and materialism, and putting others down to show one’s own superiority.
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