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Nathaniel N.

@nat_nn

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"At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet." - Plato

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Aug 4, 2020

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Flaky Friends

They are the friends that say yes to plans but ‘flake out’ at the last minute, wasting our time or even embarrassing us in the process. They do it due to personal issues, absentmindedness or an inability to organize their day.

Occasionally, we can give our friends the benefit of doubt, understanding that they are forgetful or scattered. If they are with us in times of emergency, or major events we can accept their flakiness.

Nathaniel N. (@nat_nn) - Profile Photo

@nat_nn

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The Best Way to Deal With a Flaky Friend

lifehacker.com

Important skills to maintain healthy relationships

In order to cultivate and maintain a healthy relationship both partners must have or are developing the following skills:

  • To be able to make sound decisions
  • The ability to put themselves in a good mood
  • To be able to rein in their bad mood or irritability
  • The ability to solve problems
  • The ability to effectively communicate with their partner
  • They must be able to tolerate frustration; and
  • They must be able to practice empathy

Want to keep your relationship on solid ground? Get enough sleep

ideas.ted.com

The Kübler-Ross Model of Grieving

Grief comes in many forms and everyone has experienced it in many different ways, but this model theory is only a reference, not a rule. The five stages of grief are:

  • Denial
  • Anger
  • Bargaining
  • Depression
  • Acceptance.

The five stages of grief were once known as the five stages of death, however, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, the Swiss American psychiatrist that invented this theory extended her model to many different kinds of losses.

Attachment Styles

We all have a personal bonding style, which is based early on in life according to our upbringing and how we act, feel and think in a close relationship.

Attachment is our bond with our first caregiver, which is usually a parent. The style we form while growing up usually stays with us in adulthood and beyond.

Which of These Four Attachment Styles Is Yours?

scientificamerican.com

Anger and Aggression
  • Anger: An emotion felt when we believe we have been wronged.
  • Aggression: is an act of expression of the anger, by our words our actions. Aggression can be insults, sarcasm, shouting or physical forms like breaking things. It can also manifest itself in stress, loneliness, anxiety, guilt, or awkwardness.

When we criticize the anger, we are providing fuel to the fire, leading to further aggression on the angry person's part. If we ignore and give in, we are setting a wrong example and the person learns that it is ok and effective to be angry.

How to Handle Other People's Anger Like a Pro

nickwignall.com

Relationships are a predictor of the quality of life

Your social relationships are actually a strong predictor of the quality of life, both psychological and physical. Invest in your relationships; material possessions don't generally bring lasting happiness.

Your intimate and platonic relationships need to be nurtured with love and care in order for them to thrive and produce healthy relationship habits. With good social relations, we end up happier, less stressed, more resilient to pain, and lowered cognitive decline.

3 Evidence-Based Lessons for Living a Good Life

psychologytoday.com

Proposing On One Knee
  • Kneeling on one knee while proposing has its roots in an ancient practise, originated in the Persian Empire.
  • This was part of a rank-based greeting ritual, called proskynesis, adopted by Alexander The Great.
  • The 11th century Knights used this gesture towards the ladies, something called ‘courtly love’, a romantic commitment that was done even to married ladies.
  • The Knights pledged to serve and honour the lady they love.

Why Do People Propose on One Knee?

mentalfloss.com

Modern Love

Modern love is harder than ever, as commitment becomes synonymous with the loss of self. The western world has always cherished a sense of individualism, and each person is to be a complete package, being able to provide compassion, sexual excitement, financial freedom and even self worth.

The result: Love is commodified

Why is Modern Love So Damn Hard?

estherperel.com

The positive impact of forgiveness

Forgiving someone can reduce our stress levels, risk of heart disease and mental illness. It can prevent cognitive decline in later life, help you earn more money, and be happier.

Forgiveness is part of every culture, but how we choose to offer forgiveness are affected by our cultures and our personal psychologies.

What other cultures can teach us about forgiveness

bbc.com

When We Focus On Other People

More often than not, we are trying to correct or direct things in other people’s relationships.

By focussing on other people’s associations, we end up directing how other people should behave, while being blind towards our own functioning in the relationship system.

Example: We try to manage how our parents relate to each other, or how our partner relates to our child.

How We End Up Managing Other People's Relationships

psychologytoday.com

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