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Love is Not Enough
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Because we idealize love, we overestimate it
We see it as a cure for all of life’s problems. And when we believe that all we need is love, we’re more likely to ignore fundamental values such as respect and commitment towards the people we care about. - Mark Manson
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Idealizing love=unrealistic expectations
....about what love actually is and what it can do for us. These unrealistic expectations then sabotage the very relationships we hold dear in the first place. - Mark Manson
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Love doesn't equal compatibility
Falling in love with someone doesn’t necessarily mean they’re a good partner for you. Love is an emotional process; compatibility is a logical process. And the two don’t bleed into one another very well.
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Love is not special
But your self-respect is. So is your dignity. So is your ability to trust. Yes, you need more in life than love.Love is necessary. Love is beautiful. But love is not enough.
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Youngsters are now wary of a life-long relationship and consider it as an option.
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Key Ideas
Our ideas of love
The differences in how people have loved throughout history suggest that our style of loving is to a significant extent determined by what the prevailing environment dictates.
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What is lacking in art
... are crucial elements of wisdom, realism and maturity. Our love stories excite us to expect things of love that are neither very possible nor very practical.
We learn to judge ourselves by the hopes and expectations fostered by a misleading artistic medium.
How love stories affect us
Emma Bovary in Madame Bovary (1856) spent her childhood immersed in Romantic fiction. As a result, she’s expecting that her husband will be someone who understands her soul perfectly.
When she does get married to the kind, thoughtful but human. But she is quickly bored by the routines of married life. She is convinced that her life has gone profoundly wrong for one central reason: because it’s so different from what the novels she knows told her it would be.