Ananya Dobhal's Key Ideas from 8 Rules of Love
by Jay Shetty

If we are constantly looking for love or constantly focused on our partner, we'll be distracted from the vital work of understanding our-selves. If we don't understand ourselves, we risk taking on the tastes and values of our partner. Their vision becomes our vision.

We don't want to mold ourselves to someone else simply because we don't know ourselves.

We can integrate our partner's tastes with confidence and autonomy if we bring our own to the table.

Through choices we make in solitude, we set our own standard for how we want to live and love and be loved.

With the space to write our narrative from our own point of view, we gradually overcome the influence of movies, books, our parents' or caregiver's model, or a partners wishes. We clarify our vision of love. Solitude helps you recognize that there is a you before, a you during, and a you after every relationship, forging your own way even when you have company and love

We don’t make choices based on infatuation or follow someone else's vision of love or passively let things play out without knowing what we want Instead we gradually express the standard we’ve developed to check if it matches.